1992, the Persian Gulf
Dan pulled the towel from around his hips and threw
himself down onto the mattresses, lit fag dangling from
the corner of his mouth. His hair dripped water onto
the blankets, with single drops rolling over his skin.
Vadim put the shining boot down to marvel at the toned
skin, and wrapped up the polishing kit.
Dan inhaled, "fancy a stint to my home country
before heading to France?" Exhaling with a sound
of contentment. He'd just come back from a particularly
gruelling shift, and the first moment of relaxation
was always the best. Right after wolfing down
Vadim had learned several Dan did not really consider
himself a 'Brit', and that it seemed to count for something
to call him Scottish or even Scots.
Scotland. Land of the Brave." Dan grinned, stretched
his legs all the way down to his toes before flopping
back into a boneless heap. "We'll be in Europe
anyway, and I'd like you to see some of the most beautiful
parts of Scotland, especially the Highlands. Show you
my peasant roots." He laughed.
you are my favourite peasant, Dan. Too much culture
would spoil you, and make you moody, like I am."
Vadim rested his arms on his knees, studying Dan doing
his best cat impression: lying there like he didn't
have a care in the world. He looked like he could revert
from awake to asleep within a split second. "I'd
like to see it."
that means we'll have a look at Edinburgh and instead
of going to every bloody museum and historical site
I get to enjoy the pubs, aye? And then, of course, off
to the North. I want you to see the area I come from.
It's just a tiny village, though, nothing interesting."
Stubbing his cigarette out in a makeshift ashtray, Dan
pulled a couple of pillows close and propped himself
smiled, but the thought struck him that, if it was such
a tiny village, they would run into friends, acquaintances,
and the whole host of Dan's contacts from his youth,
childhood, and whatever time he'd spent there on R&R.
And his family, obviously. His face darkened at the
thought and there was unrest, suddenly. "We should
be subtle. About ... us. About what we are to each other."
What do you mean?" Dan's brows furrowed, scratching
his scarred abs.
family. If we meet them ... they don't know you are
homosexual, or do they?"
would we meet my family?" Dan's brows rose even
higher, completely forgetting the second part.
they still live in that village? Why else are you going
there?" Vadim felt he was on thin ice, somehow.
Of course a visit to the home village would mean a visit
to the family. What else? And why not? It would be rude
to not at least pay a visit.
they do." Dan shrugged, "but wasn't exactly
planning on staying over." Reaching for a water
bottle, he took his time unscrewing the cap. "Last
time I saw my brother, wife and kids, was when I visited
my father shortly before he died. I was on R&R from
Afghanistan." Tipping the bottle to his lips, he
took an even longer time drinking. "It was right
after the shit with the Muja corpses." Wiping his
lips, "that's, what, how many years ago? Can you
or six?" Vadim realised it was guesswork. He didn't
know. He didn't want to remember, had pushed Afghanistan
as far away as he could.
84? Hang on, I forgot, I actually went up again
in 87, when I got out of the army. Went to see my brother
to settle some finances. I think that might be about
it. Makes it five years." Dan shrugged, while Vadim
didn't want to think about when his father would die.
He was old, even frail by now, but he might still have
five, ten, or fifteen years in him. Years spent away
from his ex-daughter-in-law, with his brother and other
relatives. But in essence, his 'old man' as the Yanks
called it, was alone. A disturbing thought. "So,
just that brother and his family? Are you not on good
I am, my brother has been dealing with my finances for
years. He was the one who invested my money in property
and sold the houses for good profit when I needed the
cash." Dan shrugged. "He's a good guy, but
I'm just not close with my family. Never got to see
them regularly. Was always out and about, and figured
it was a damn lot easier to stay away in case I got
killed. Don't want anyone to shed a tear, aye?"
He produced a mock-cheerful grin.
frowned, then sat down next to Dan, to run a hand through
his hair. He hadn't realized all those years that Dan
had been completely alone even at home. It made his
guts clench. To refuse human contact only to make sure
that he wouldn't be missed. He was speechless, shocked.
Dan poked Vadim's ribs. "What's up? Did you think
I was doing the job, all on my own for all those years,
with a big loving family behind me?" He laughed
but I didn't think it was that bleak. I thought there
was ... more for you." More? Like a loving, supportive
wife that watched his back and lived a lie?
What the hell would that be? I fucked bimbos, got pissed
with mates. Stuffed holes left right and centre, that's
all I wanted and needed. Until
" He trailed
off and mock-punched Vadim's ribs, more a gentle touch
than anything. "No one at home knew what I was
really doing. OK, SAS and all that shit, and my father
was bloody proud, but I was on secret missions, and
you know as much as I do that it's better for everyone
on the outside not to know too much. Safer. For them,
for me." He shrugged and smiled. "Besides,
I got you, and now you're on my side, I have
all I need."
was on your side for quite a while longer", said
Vadim with that rare, tender smile. "Only not official.
And not quite exclusive, but I've been yours for a long
smiled, leaned his head against Vadim's. "But you're
mine now with all the bells and whistles, aye?"
blood and guts, breath and everything else." Vadim
lay back on his elbows, taking Dan's head with him,
looking thoughtful. "Do you want to visit your
you think I should?"
it be rude if you didn't? He's your brother. Just, you
know, catching up. I can stay at the hotel while you
meet him and his family, it's no problem."
laughed again, this time the humour was back. "There
are no hotels as far as I remember. Just B&Bs. Guess
they'd be looking funny at us if we booked a double
we'll book singles."
Dan shook his head, "no fucking way."
Vadim thought, that it was easier to live as a couple
in a mercenary camp than in one's own hometown. Well,
'easier' as in getting beaten up, ambushed, constantly
sneered at - until the point when one had actually proven
that one had more balls than the rest of them. "It's
I said, no fucking way. I'd rather not go back."
Sitting up, Dan studied Vadim. "I don't give a
shit what my family knows or not. I never told them
I'm gay because it didn't matter to me if they knew
or not. Besides, back then I wasn't quite
Dan shrugged, couldn't find the right word, "anyway,
five years ago I wasn't as much 'me' as I am now. So,
we either fucking go as who we are, or we don't fucking
go at all."
damn." Vadim shook his head. "What would you
say? 'This is Vadim, my gay partner'?"
More like 'this is Vadim. My partner'. Bloody unnecessary,
the 'gay' part, isn't it?"
felt another wave of dread, just the thought of being
exposed again, of seeing people - family - shocked,
appalled and disgusted again. Why not simply let them
live? Leave them their illusions? "Why hurt or
disturb your family, Dan? For what? Why can't we just
keep a low profile?"
the fuck would they be hurt by who I am? And
what the fuck does that matter to them? I am
fucking me! If they have a fucking problem with
that, they can shove it up their fucking arses."
Dan had gone from mellow to extremely pissed off in
Everybody had a problem with it. Vadim remembered too
well the hurt in his father's eyes, the 'how could we
have helped you', the guilt, the shame. He didn't want
to go through that again.
their problem, not mine. If you want to get through
your bloody life lying all the way, then guess what,
Russkie, you can do it on your fucking own." Dan
sat up, tense, dark eyes on fire.
just that it's nobody else's business, Dan." Vadim
stood, needed to take the brunt of the rage standing.
Lying. No, just keeping a low profile. It wasn't lying.
Not technically. "Why do we have to go ... out
of our way to rub it in their faces?"
the fucking fuck do you mean with rubbing it
into their faces?" Dan jerked, as if wanting to
get up as well, but remained sitting, fists at his side.
"I just am who I am, what the motherfucking fuck's
'rubbing' about that? Every stupid dripping cunt can
eat the fucking face of her fucker in public, but if
I simply turn up with my partner, that's 'rubbing it
in'?" Dan did finally get up, naked or not, he
was fuming with rage. "Fuck you, together
with them, if that's your idea of leading your life."
you. Vadim's words died in his throat. He knew he
was being a coward and now he was ashamed of that, too.
He'd either get all that disgust, or Dan's rage. Dan
was pushing him into it, but he just couldn't do it.
He'd be ashamed either way, for what he was, for what
he felt. Degenerate. Coward. Broken. He couldn't meet
that bristling gaze, looked to the side instead. Standing
there, feeling cold and numb. "Need shower",
he pressed out, trying to make it sound normal and reached
for his shower kit. Retreating so fast that, yes, the
fact that it was 'running away' was really damned obvious.
was still raging, even when Vadim had fled. Pacing the
few yards in the hut, to and fro, while smoking a fag,
and then another. Finally grabbing a pair of shorts
and a t-shirt, he got his feet into trainers and stormed
out of the hut with the third fag between his teeth
and a water bottle under his arm. Knackered from the
shift, knees aching, but he had to get rid of the aggression
that was eating him up from the inside. Couldn't understand
why the fuck Vadim behaved like such a coward, and what
the fuck was bad about being together? If they'd survived
the likes of Midge and his cronies, emerging victorious,
what the hell was wrong with being who they were and
got himself into the gym, and ignoring the aches and
pains of his aging body, he beasted it in a merciless
regime, with more weights than he usually used, and
many more repeats.
had a long, drawn-out shower, which didn't quite relax
him. He could still feel that dread in his body, a very
physical reaction. Body so tensed up from it, he felt
stiff and weakened. Eventually he returned, to find
Dan gone. Jean hadn't seen him, nobody seemed to have,
and the Mess tent was also devoid of Dan. Left the gym.
Vadim walked there and, sure enough, Dan, in the process
of working his muscles so hard that he'd ache in a million
places tomorrow. Vadim inhaled deeply, stepped behind
the bench on which Dan was lying, and took the weight
from his grip when Dan started to struggle pushing it
up. Apart from another guy in the corner doing pull-ups,
they were pretty much alone.
was looking up, straight at Vadim. Face drenched in
sweat, he said nothing.
crouched near Dan's head, elbows on thighs, head lowered,
speaking in a hushed tone. "I'm not ready for that.
I ... when I see that disgust, it still ... hurts me.
I can't just shrug it off like you can. They ... called
me all these things. The KGB. They said homosexual ...
activity would extend my jail sentence. They insinuated
... things. Like I'd slept my way up, that I enjoyed
to debase myself by getting fucked, that I'd raped my
son ... all these things. I'm not ... not ready to face
that kind of thing again, Dan. I'm not strong enough.
I'm not like you." He stood, turning away because
the dread was worse, had transformed into weakness,
leaden weakness, the feeling and taste of defeat.
did nothing, lay there, silent. Too shocked to the core
to move a muscle. He hadn't ... hadn't known ... couldn't
even make sense of any of his thoughts. Got finally
up, felt more shattered than could have been caused
by his workout. Every movement worth a lifetime of dread.
still didn't say anything when he got up and wiped his
face with the edge of his soggy t-shirt. Not even when
he placed his hand into the small of Vadim's back. Finally
a word, just one. "Come." Leading Vadim out
of the gym and back towards the hut.
followed, felt the shame of being so fucking weak, but
at the same time the touch had replaced Dan's rage.
He didn't know what to expect, but he was glad that
Dan didn't shout at him now, was glad for the contact.
closed the door behind them, and took a step closer
to Vadim, until there was hardly a hand's breadth between
them. He touched Vadim's face, tracing the cheekbone,
along the jaw line, until his fingertips merely rested
on smooth skin. "I am so fucking sorry." Quietly,
while looking at Vadim. No rage now in his eyes, just
a deep seated sorrow. "I didn't get it. I told
you I'm no fucking brainy, just didn't realise I am
such an idiot." His lips twitched, trying to turn
into a smile, "forgive me?"
to forgive, Dan. Nothing at all. I'm not ... not ashamed
of what I feel, but of what ... I see in people's faces.
I can't explain all that. I can't take that from them,
that ... disgust. It's better they think I'm ... that
I fit in." Found it still hard to breathe, pressed
Dan's hand to his cheek. "Maybe one day."
Dan nodded and swallowed, "maybe one day."
Remorse unveiled in his eyes. Too open, too readable,
and too damn straightforward.
You are ... good like you are. Your confidence, your
balls." Vadim tried a smile and touched his forehead
to Dan's. "We don't have to visit your family.
Maybe ... hire a caravan, and we won't even have to
deal with any bed and breakfast owners. There are always
just wanted to be
" Dan trailed off and never
finished the sentence, just shrugged, drawing in a deep
breath. "Don't know if I want to go. Better to
just stay far away." Shrugged again, "they
say Sweden and Denmark are cool places. They marry in
Denmark, you know. Blokes." Kept shrugging. "I
" didn't finish that sentence either
and pulled his lips into a smile instead, before taking
a step back. "Got to go for a shower." Turning
away. Looking for his towel and soap bag.
Dan so flustered hurt. It hurt because it was his fault,
caused by being a coward. Konstantinov. The torturer
was right. He'd never fully recover. Shame was one of
their weapons. And now they had hurt Dan, too. "Dan,
I ..." I'm scared, I'm so ashamed, I'm so fucking
broken. "... want to go. I want to see Scotland.
And where you're from." Even if that meant being
not welcome, worse, being hated and feeling another
wave of disgust and disdain. "I ... can face it.
I will face it. It's ... alright." And at the same
time, he was scared, could feel himself shudder at the
thought, because of the tension building up inside.
see, OK?" Towel and soap bag under his arm, Dan
tried another smile while patting Vadim's shoulder.
"Plenty of time left, we just decide closer to
a step to the door, "I'll see you in a bit. Just
... shower, you know. Stuff." With that he slipped
through the door, closing it quietly behind him.
nodded, wincing inwardly, wondered if he should keep
Dan back, but didn't want to be hysterical. Just felt
that horrible thing, being helpless, having made a mistake,
with no way to repair it, no way to make it vanish.
He rubbed his face, restless and nervous, sat down on
the bed. How was it that everything was alright when
they were alone and together, like in one of those fucking
caves, but somehow, once outside factors were drawn
in, they screwed everything up?
returned after half an hour, more than double the time
he usually took. Bringing with him a pack of biscuits,
one from the stash he'd been sent by the Baroness and
which he hoarded in the other hut. Cigarette between
his lips, towel around his hips, his smile was pretty
much back to normal when he stepped through the door.
"Fancy some bikkies? Was thinking of getting a
Vadim checked the time. "Of course, tea."
Nothing in the world that tea didn't make better, he
heard Dr Williams say, and the thought of the older
man was somehow reassuring. "Yes. I could start
it? Or at least try and find milk."
tea. Milk and sugar."
remember", said Vadim, lightly, glad he could get
busy and do something, even if it was just making tea.
threw himself once more onto the mattress, exactly the
same way as before. He grinned up at Vadim as if nothing
had ever happened, and Vadim served the tea and sat
with him. Between biscuits and tea, Dan did not bring
up the topic again, and neither did he later. Not a
word. Not now, not through the night, and not the days
after. Joking and grinning, the same irreverent, easy-going
man as before, with the same appetite for sex and Vadim.
The same arms that wrapped around Vadim at night and
the same body that spooned behind him.
however, didn't quite forget. Wrestled with the thought,
and how to bring up the topic again. And most importantly,
when, and in what way. He carefully examined himself,
as he always did, and expected for Dan to bring it up,
but it didn't happen.
night, after sex, Vadim murmured: "We should book
flights for Britain ... and I should call Dr Williams.
I was thinking we could meet him and then go by train
up to Edinburgh. Rent a car, and you show me ... your
had drifted off, sated to the bones, and utterly relaxed.
"Hm? Britain?" Murmured, he had hardly caught
half of it. "Weren't we meant to go to Kiwiland
when we're done in this place?"
a long flight to New Zealand
I thought we'd stick
around in Europe until Jean gets his ring on his hand."
guess that's right. Got a couple months to kill
before our next destination. Heard rumours it's going
to be the Balkans." Dan yawned, rolled onto his
back and stuck his feet out of the blanket. Stretching
his calves while his eyes remained half-closed. "Didn't
we should go?"
shifted, adjusted his body, rearranged his limbs until
his head rested on Dan's shoulder and he could see the
stubble on Dan's throat close. "I'd like to see
where you come from. Where
they make people like
chuckled in the back of his throat, which vibrated through
Vadim. "People like me? You mean Scottish peasants,
aye?" Twisting his head until he caught the tips
of the short-shorn hair, kissing Vadim's head.
if we go, how do you want to do it?" Dan paused
for a while, the topic wasn't one he'd wanted to engage
with again, but he was sated and mellow enough this
time to gave it another go. "Twin rooms? Mates
do take twin rooms, cheaper that way. Because, I swear,
on everything that is important to me, that you won't
get me to take single rooms. I will not sleep
in another room from you. Not on R&R."
Twin. Separate beds. That could work. And we'd just
move the mattresses on the floor and still sleep together.
I doubt we fit both into the same bed
case there's some
vigorous movements going."
we just don't have any sex but at least fall asleep,
squeezed into one bed. You can chuck me out when I'm
snoring." Dan smiled. "And if we do go, we
will lie when we're in rural areas. Aye?"
That should work. Be careful where it counted and less
careful where it didn't mean a thing. "And regarding
your family? Should we meet up at a restaurant and have
a friendly chat?"
are no restaurants, just pubs, and I don't think you'd
quite fit into a Highland pub."
Vadim raised an eyebrow. What was this place
that it was so very peculiar?
You'd be sticking out like a sore thumb." Dan yawned
and shrugged, he didn't feel comfortable, but wouldn't
let on. Not this time. "I call my brother and let
him know I'm coming, bringing a 'mate' with me, who
happens to be a fellow merc and who happens to go to
the same wedding of yet another fellow merc and mate,
and who happens to want to get a chance of travelling
round Scotland, so I happen to take him along."
Dan shrugged again, "but I warn you, I am a shit
but we are comrades. Okay, we are more than that, but
if we just stick to the official version."
official version, Vadim, is that: We. Are. Lovers. So
don't start with that one again, aye?" Dan smiled
to take the sting out.
other official version, then." Oh fuck,
he was starting to think in Doublethink. Doublespeak.
Dan stretched his legs out once more. "I don't
want to discuss it, OK? I do what you want and I take
you to Scotland as a mate and nothing more, but I just
don't want to talk about it." Yawning. "And
besides, it is time to sleep. Aye?"
nodded. "Yes. To sleep, perchance to dream."
that one of your depressing authors?"
that's the Bard of Avon. Old Bill. William Shakespeare,
your one true national genius."
shit, he's the one we had to read in school. Romeo and
all that crap. A balcony and a stupid bint making great
literature? I tell you, that bastard was a sadist and
I'd like to punch the guy for every dreadful hour we
had to spend reading that bullshit." Dan grinned.
Did it never strike you that that friend of Romeo's
was quite in love with Romeo? And then Romeo falls for
Dan rubbed his eyes, yawning again. "I can't remember
jack shit, but if they got it on, that Romeo guy and
his friend, even I would read it."
far as I remember, there's some evidence that they did
Some hints in the text. I can't quote it, but
when I was reading it, I thought this guy -Mercutio?
- was being very jealous."
Oh come on, Russkie, I don't do hints. Give me full-on
porn or nothing." Grinning, Dan poked and prodded
Vadim until he lay on his side and Dan could cuddle
up. "But if you ever come across a good porn book,"
yawning, "let me know, I'll read it, even though
videos are better."
savage. I thought your favourite was the live thing?"
Vadim's hand moved to Dan's flank, stroking the hip
course it is." Nuzzling the back of Vadim's neck,
Dan grinned sleepily. "But sometimes a man's got
to wank. Easier on the system."
Vadim's fingers tightened on Dan's leg. "I'll let
you recharge, then. It's in my own best interest."
Chuckling lowly and relaxing against Dan, who'd already
fallen asleep. He was pretty much awake, but would just
try to sleep. Thinking, going through what had happened,
retracing the day, the week, and then moving forward.
Planning, as far ahead as he could. It still didn't
sit quite right with him that Dan didn't want to talk
about Scotland, but he respected that. Family was always
a tricky business.
had promised Vadim that he'd organise everything, but
he otherwise didn't engage in conversations about the
plans. He happily talked about France and the wedding,
even about his worries regarding the best man speech,
but Scotland was strangely off limits. They'd go straight
to the Highlands, that was all he'd told Vadim. Stopping
over in Edinburgh later, flying from there to France
for the wedding.
the day came, Dan stood impatiently beside a Lannie,
his bag slung over his shoulder, waiting for Vadim.
"We'll miss the bloody flight!"
we book another one." Vadim came closer, duffle
bag slung across his back.
spend even more money? Bollocks! Get a shift on, Russkie."
As long as the gate's not closed when we get there,
we should be okay."
my idea of a relaxing start to R&R." Dan grinned
and slapped Vadim's arse before getting into the car.
gave a surprised laugh at the slap, which actually stung
a bit, and he plonked down in the car. "Alright,
alright." Watching Dan as he drove. "Like
that would break the bank."
got to watch my money. Remember the farm? I want to
get that done before this body breaks down." Dan
flashed a grin, but the humour wasn't entirely there.
More tense than usual.
know, but we have my money, too. And if we can't afford
the work, we put it back together ourselves. And besides,
even if one of us gets fucked up, there's still the
other. We don't have to worry about it."
shrugged, but got them to the airport in record time,
left the Lannie in the car park to be picked up by one
of the mercs later, and they legged it to the terminal,
where the flight was being announced.
It's not 'last call to Heathrow' yet", huffed Vadim.
Running, however, right next to Dan. "The gate's
not for much longer." Flashing IDs and tickets,
they just about made it to the plane, where they threw
themselves into the seats, catching their breath. "Right."
Dan fastened his seat belt, "from Heathrow it's
change-over onto a plane to Glasgow, then straight up
along the West Coast. I got a hire car booked for us."
smiled. "We'll take turns driving. Do we stay somewhere
overnight or when are we expected where?" Pulling
the seat belt tighter and stretching his legs, getting
comfortable for the flight.
we stay in Glasgow for a couple of days. Didn't you
want to have a suit made for the wedding? Besides, we'd
arrive too late to drive up to my brother's." Dan
turned his head and looked out of the window, staring
at nothing while the plane began to move on the runway.
reached across the armrest and placed a hand on Dan's
knee and Dan turned his head, looking at him through
the shades, with clear surprise. Vadim took Dan's hand
as the plane accelerated and finally lifted off. The
land beneath them bleeding away and they were soon on
the way to Europe. Scotland. Britain. The island nation
that had taken him in. It felt odd, like a meeting with
a stranger, even after Selection. He'd be walking around,
not cloistered away in barracks, not training for any
specific purpose, but actually encountering his adopted
country. Not a mother- or fatherland, but a sanctuary
nonetheless. "I'm actually looking forward to this",
he said, as if surprised by the thought.
you?" Dan was still holding onto Vadim's hand,
the gesture a novelty, at least in public. Semi-public.
"I didn't think you were."
curious. And it will be good to not wear camo for a
while." Vadim looked at him. "I think it's
a good kind of nervous."
was looking at him, even pushed the shades off his eyes.
His expression entirely neutral. "Aye, but you
told me you didn't want anyone to know who we are. Are
you still adamant about that?"
we are. Not what we are. Vadim frowned at the curious
way to put this. What - answer: lovers. Who - answer:
Dan and Vadim. How was the orientation thing part of
the Who instead of part of the What? "I don't know
how they will react, that's all", said Vadim, feeling
the dread again, but fighting it this time.
don't know either." Dan shrugged, kept looking
at Vadim, but when nothing else was forthcoming, he
shrugged again. "Alright, I'll lie. Shouldn't be
too difficult, even though I'm a shit liar. Am not exactly
on intimate terms with my brother and his family, haven't
seen them for a few years, but he does keep my finances
in bloody good order."
nodded. "I'm sorry I'm such a coward", he
said, almost tonelessly, again the dread replaced with
OK." Dan drew in a deep breath, "guess I should
apologise for being pushy. I know they fucked you up,
but it's hard to fully understand what it did to you."
pressed his lips together, looking around for the bustling
stewards who were just getting the trolley ready behind
them. Taking the moment to swallow and keep his composure,
while Dan squeezed his hand.
I don't think you ever were happy with being
gay, aye?" Dan asked quietly.
inhaled. "That's not
an easy question, Dan.
It's not as simple as 'yes' or 'no'. Did I
I wish I wasn't? Yes, I did. There were times when I
cursed it. When I wanted to fit in, to not be a target.
was ashamed. But that's always from outside.
It's when they fuck my mind. When they tell me I'm a
criminal for sleeping with men. A degenerate. My
the masseur once told me I should never believe them
when they told me I couldn't win because of my feelings.
That was good advice. He said I should never believe
that my feelings weaken me. When there's nobody else,
just you and me, or just me, I'm not ashamed. It's part
of me, I accepted it long ago. I know my life would
have been different if I wasn't what I am", not
who, "and it's certainly tougher, but I am not
ashamed of you, or what I feel for you. It's what other
people think of me, how they treat me for it, how they
assume I'm a criminal for feeling the way I do. A limp-wristed
faggot who slept his way up, another man's suka. That
that is tough to bear. To see that contempt and
disgust in people's faces. And I know I shouldn't care,
but it bites."
shook his head, opened his mouth to say something, but
shut it again. Couldn't come up with anything to say,
just kept looking and holding that hand. Murmuring something
under his breath, while leaning his head against Vadim's
shoulder. Didn't get it, couldn't understand, because
he'd never felt like that. Ironic, really, that he,
the gay-basher, who'd fucked himself through dozens
of bimbos, to prove he was a stud and straight as hell,
couldn't give a shit about anyone's comments or thoughts.
But what did it matter. Arguing anymore or trying to
understand each other, wouldn't get them any further.
Thus he said nothing and simply stayed close. Physical
contact had always worked for them throughout the years,
he'd simply have to cling to that as long as Vadim let
pressed his hand for a long moment and rested his head
against Dan's. Hoped Dan would understand. Being gay
didn't actually make him a happier or unhappier person.
It didn't make him better, or worse. It just was. No
reason to be happy about. Something like the blood type,
or eye colour. "But it's good you're happy with
it, Dan. Very good."
as in 'I don't mind it. It's fine. It's the way I am.'"
Dan sighed, ignored the second steward, "that's
the way we use 'happy' in English. Not running around
ecstatically, shouting out to the world how deliriously
happy I am because I am gay."
laughed softly at the image. "Okay. Then I'm happy
about it, too. Most of the time, at least, unless some
bastard mocks or attacks me for it." Remembering,
he thought he'd stood his ground against Dan, back in
Afghanistan, before they'd stopped to try and kill each
other. But then, there had been different rules between
will always be people talking bullshit." Dan shrugged,
"at least we're not in the same shitty position
those guys were in, I was beating the crap out of. Back
in the bad old days." Finally acknowledging a steward
when they came past for the third time, sitting up to
get his drink and morsel of food. He stretched as best
he could, before leaning back in the seat. "Well,
at least I get to show you my country. Scotland. That
should be worth something, aye?"
not 'something'." Vadim accepted his drink and
food with a nod towards the steward. Trusting Dan to
make the decisions when they'd be in the country. He
didn't expect any kind of trouble, but was looking forward
to actually seeing the places that had produced somebody
like Dan. Moscow would very much remain off limits,
so Scotland would have to do.
rest of the flight was spent uneventfully, with Dan
either snoozing or gazing out of the window. He never
tired to watch the endless sky and the clouds beneath,
wishing himself back into the Afghan mountains, a place
he'd probably never see again, even though he hadn't
given up on it yet.
in Heathrow, they had to navigate the moloch of an insanely
busy international airport in an even more insanely
busy capital city, and while they were waiting in the
queue for 'EU citizens', holding their identical looking
passports in hands, Dan turned to Vadim. "Have
you actually been anywhere in Britain?"
from London and the
" Vadim paused, knew
he'd slipped up, but also knew that he had to mask it
well now, because, despite everything, he had no idea
how Dan would react to the whole London episode from
years back, "the little place, what was it called?
yes, guess they shipped you to Hereford via London,
aye? Wouldn't surprise me, everyone seems to stop over
here for everything."
roads lead to Rome." One day it might slip. One
day. But not today. Ideally, never. Vadim had very few
secrets, but this whole 'go off to London and commit
a murder' episode - never mind the people he'd met there,
what was the other man's name again?
He couldn't remember. He'd fucked him, had seen him
bared and vulnerable and kind, but he didn't remember.
grinned, stepping forward to the glass booth and having
his passport swiftly examined before making it through
and waiting for Vadim on the other side, who was still
amazed that he could cross borders this easily. "I'm
afraid I think London's a bit shit. Too expensive."
He shrugged when Vadim turned up as well.
seemed very big, very crowded, and
not much else.
But very free."
big places are. Go to Newcastle, and shit, you can't
be freer than that. Or Glasgow, but you'll see for yourself."
Dan chuckled, "good thing, though, we can fend
for ourselves, because Glasgow is a dangerous old dump.
Comes with the freedom." They didn't have to hurry
this time and could make their way leisurely through
the corridors to their destination gate, to catch their
anything?" Dan pointed to a stall with hot drinks
and sandwiches. "I could do with a cuppa, but coffee's
shit around here, as far as I remember. Never got a
single decent brew in this country. Usually instant
or stewed acid."
It's hard to make tea entirely unpleasant."
is the land of tea, I'd think even an airport will manage."
Dan was turning towards the stall, fishing for his wallet,
Vadim touched his shoulder briefly. "And something
to eat - something small, like a Snickers."
Pah! You mean Marathon. Damned renaming of old favourites.
But aye, I'll get you one, might grab one for myself."
It took about ten minutes before Dan returned. Balancing
a couple of paper cups and a handful of chocolate bars.
make up my mind." Dropping an assortment of Snickers,
Mars, Bounty, Milky Way, Caramac, Galaxy, Curly Wurly
and - worst of all - a large peanut butter energy bar
- into Vadim's lap, then holding one of the cups out
to him. "There you go. We've got half an hour if
there's no delay. Feast yourself on the airport's finest."
He grinned and sat down.
took the cup and glanced accusingly at the energy bar.
will haunt me to my grave,
aye?" However, that was the first one he ate, while
Dan kept laughing. He still liked the flavour and it
worked alright with the bitter dark tea to wash the
cloying sweetness down. "If you want any of these
be my guest."
you'd never ask." In the next half hour, Dan worked
his way through all of the chocolate bars, except for
the Snickers, which he waved in front of Vadim's face
as their flight got called. "Wasn't that the one
you wanted?" Walking in front of him, like the
proverbial carrot on a stick, while boarding.
laughed. "I'd tell you what I want, but then we'd
get thrown off the plane for gross indecency."
Mile High Club for me?"
his head, Dan murmured, for once keeping his voice down,
"it's the 'club' of all of those who've fucked
in the loos of an air plane, high up in the sky."
None of that for us. Not this time."
Dan grinned and managed to sashay his arse in front
of Vadim, to the mild shock of an elderly couple who'd
already sat down along the aisle. Grinning, he got into
the window seat, and the whole rigmarole of boredom
started up again. At least the flight was mercifully
short and they had barely time for a drink.
they arrived, it was waiting, queuing, shuffling and
waiting some more, before they got to their luggage.
"I tell you what." Dan frowned darkly, as
they stood around the carousel, trying to spot their
kit. "I'll never fly anything but first class again.
Civilian air traffic is shit."
laughed. "It certainly has more leg room. They
must have designed those seats for people who are five
foot six the most."
thought it wouldn't matter for a short hop, but bullshit.
Give me a Hercules any day." Spotting his bergan,
Dan snatched it off the rotating band, closely followed
by Vadim who'd spotted his and just checked whether
everything was in order.
If we're lucky we make it to the hotel in time for dinner.
I'm bloody starving."
are always starving, Mad Dog."
Widening his eyes, Dan produced a face splitting grin
while waggling his brows. "I might be forty-two,
but I'm always starving. And I don't mean food."
Overheard by a somewhat confused looking girl, he flashed
a grin at her, before heading out of the baggage hall.
Shoulder to shoulder with Vadim, who figured escape
was the best they could do now, and walking unhindered
through the green tunnel.
the arrivals hall, Dan swivelled slowly around, until
he spotted the hire car sign and right beside it the
info about the airport hotels. It took quite some time,
with all those people in front of them, but they finally
had the keys for a car and information about the hotels
surrounding the airport.
didn't book anything, figured it wouldn't be a problem."
Dan held the brochures out to Vadim. "Pick one,
anyone. They are all modern and probably crap, but it's
only for one night. Ramada, Express or Holiday Inn?"
Waving the Ramada brochure a bit higher than the others,
and the place had three stars at least.
shook his head and confirmed the decision. "Make
it Ramada. Even though it reminds me of 'Ramadan'. What
a shit name."
long as we get some food I don't care." They found
their car without trouble, a medium sized, plain and
boring vehicle, nevertheless perfect for the journey,
and drove the few hundred yards into the hotel parking
lot. The reception area was bustling, but Dan strolled
purposefully to the first available clerk, a pretty
blonde girl. She had the broadest Glaswegian accent
when she opened her mouth to greet them.
you have a double room free?"
of course, Sir." She pulled out her reservations
list and checked the free rooms before looking up at
him. "Would you please fill in the form?"
Handing the form and pen over to Dan, she acknowledged
Vadim, who'd been behind him. "And what can I do
for you, Sir?"
needed several moments even to understand her - more
guessing than truly understanding her question, and
he was very close to acting as if he didn't speak any
English, which would have forced Dan to jump to the
rescue. Dan had ordered a double. Whatever he said that
seemed inconspicuous was, at the same time, offensive
to Dan. Vadim's jaw muscles tightened, and he could
feel his heart beat. If they got kicked out here, there
were more options. He only hoped she wouldn't get unpleasant
about it. "No, I'm
good. He is booking already."
," her eyes widened, looking from one to
the other, and then she smiled. "But of course,
that's no problem."
it? Vadim felt surprise, relief, and didn't quite trust
the situation yet. He expected the hammer to fall. "Good.
I mean, thank you."
had filled in the form, even though there had been a
moment of tension, pushing the form back to her.
glanced at it and nodded. "I hope you will enjoy
your stay here. Breakfast is between 7 and 9 AM, and
we have a licensed bar as well as a very comfortable
restaurant." Leaning across, she picked up a key,
still smiling brightly. "Third floor, just take
the corridor to the left." She handed the key to
Dan, who took it with a nod and an all too relieved
gathered up his bergan and followed Dan to the elevator,
which, thankfully, opened very soon and allowed them
to escape into the private space of the small cabin.
Glancing at the mirror, Vadim noticed he hadn't flushed
- even though he would have expected to, the way his
head was feeling.
that wasn't all that bad." Dan smiled.
shook his head. "No, it wasn't. She
it in stride."
course, she's a youngster. The times they are a-changing."
Dan grinned and leaned closer, to all intents and purposes
about to kiss. Vadim glanced at the door, hoped it wouldn't
open yet, and kissed Dan, too, couldn't really help
it, wanted to, and just hoped the timing would be lucky.
luck held and they didn't hear the 'ping' for the third
floor before they'd moved slightly apart.
to have a quick shower and then head into town for food?"
Dan stepped out of the lift, "or a quick shower
and a meal here, and then head into town? I'm starving,
but I really do want a good pint of ale, the stuff you
can't get anywhere in the world but the UK. Not that
American bear's piss." They reached the room and
Dan let them in. It was spacious enough, and while it
was bland and meaningless, it would serve well for a
night. The bed was certainly big enough.
order the food to the room while I'm showering and it
should be there when we've showered and changed. Saves
time. I'm having something with meat or fish."
Vadim set the bergan down and closed the door behind
them. "Nice enough
" He undressed, headed
to the bathroom, showered, all quick, efficient, washing
the long flight off. It would be good. Different, but
the meantime, Dan got the food sorted, and was already
stripped naked when Vadim came out of the bathroom.
"Food should be here any minute." Stepping
into the steamed-up room, "I'll just have a shower
and a shave and we're off into town after grub. I got
reception to get us a taxi in forty-five minutes."
Dan's ablutions took even less time than Vadim's, if
it hadn't been for the shaving. Twice a day, and it
wasn't getting any better.
hair was still damp when he came back out into the room
to the smell of steaks with roast potatoes and vegetables,
and a couple of beers. Vadim was just arranging the
cutlery, having dressed in what amounted to shockingly
civilian clobber - dark blue designer jeans he'd got
in Dubai on their last holiday, a nice dark grey jumper,
flat polished shoes, with his outdoors jacket expensive
enough to fit the whole composition.
hell." Dan threw himself onto the bed with a bounce.
"You look like a GQ model, or Mr Gay 1992."
laughed and shook his head. "Keep the flattery
coming, Dan. You know I have a weak spot for that
smirked, reaching to pull the trolley closer. They only
had one chair and he was happy to leave it to Vadim.
"If you're looking that good, then I better
get you to dress me as well. After all, you packed most
of my bag."
glanced at the bag. "I think the suede trousers.
Judging by the weather, that might be just the thing
what?" Dan had been lifting the lid off his plate,
stopping in mid-motion. "I have what?"
smiled at him, the kind of satisfied smile that indicated
one of his plans had come to fruition. "Oh. The
dark brown suede trousers I had tailored for you on
the basis of your favourite jeans."
almost dropped the lid, and if he had had any food in
his mouth yet, it would have spluttered across the room.
"You had suede trousers made for me? Can
it get anymore faggoty? Fucking hell, I thought you
were the one uncomfortable with being gay, hadn't expected
you to turn me into an uber-poof." Despite the
words and the righteous 'outrage', amusement was tugging
at the corners of Dan's mouth.
them on and then we'll decide how gay you look or don't
look", huffed Vadim. "I think they are fairly
maybe, but don't you think I'm too old for being a designer-fag?"
for me. Or did you have a different audience in mind?
Jean's not here."
would piss himself with laughter if he saw me in that."
Dan grinned, "but wait till I have my best man's
outfit sorted, if he laughs about that one, I deck him.
Groom or not." Dan finally put the lid down and
picked up the cutlery. "Before I start eating,
any more surprises? What am I going to wear on my feet,
what on my upper body, and what on top? Eh?" Hardly
able to suppress the grin.
you're free to choose based on that the trousers."
Vadim took the lid and set it down on the floor.
know as well as I do, that I haven't got a fucking clue,
so you better give me a hand choosing the rest, if you
want the things to go together." Dan grinned and
started to eat, shovelling the food inside.
course." The food was decent enough - probably
another good reason to choose the best hotel in the
available range. The steak at least was more than decent.
When Vadim started to eat he noticed himself how hungry
he'd been, the nervousness had suppressed the appetite.
"I just like the smell of leather", he said,
that case," chewing then quickly swallowing, "why
do we even bother with going out? We could just have
a noseful of leather and fuck." Subtle as ever,
Dan washed his mouthful down with beer, grinning. "Besides,
I like the glint and coldness of steel, but did I take
any blades with me? Did I hell."
laughed, but his body liked the idea, and the laugh
was more husky than he realized. "We can always
improvise." He grinned, soon finishing the steak,
washed everything down with water, then dug into Dan's
bag, finding the trousers, the shoes and the top. "Just
put these on, then."
finished off his beer, laughing when he saw how deftly
Vadim pulled the clothes out of the bag. "I knew
it! You packed the whole outfit, didn't you?"
plead innocent." Vadim's smile was anything but.
up, Dan lost the towel and shook his damp hair. "Give
us the kit, then, and you tell me what you think."
turning his back to Vadim, Dan bent down, presenting
his arse, which got him another, now huskier laugh,
while stepping into the leather jeans. The suede felt
warm and smooth, gliding up his legs. They fit like
a glove, and when he closed the zipper and button, they
felt and looked like a second skin. Swiftly stepping
into socks and shoes, he threw the long-sleeved top
over his head and slowly turned around his axis. "Content?"
I knew it. You manage to pull this outfit off."
Vadim stepped close, ran his hands over Dan's leather-clad
ass. Great idea. Fantastic idea. "Works for me."
would have expected something better than 'works for
me'. After all, how many ex-SAS do you think you'll
find, who let themselves get dressed up like a Barbie
doll." He grinned, "or was that 'Action Man'?"
I said you're making me hard, we would piss off the
taxi driver, Mad Dog Action Man." Vadim laughed
at him and pulled back. "Come on. Get your shoes
and let's go out. And keep that thought."
got my shoes already. Too distracted by my arse
to notice, eh?" Dan laughed and snatched the jacket.
Looking at it for a moment. "And where the hell
did you get that one from? I don't recognise it."
Slipping into the expensive outdoor jacket. Just as
short as the top, and very definitely not covering his
place I ordered mine. You warned me about the weather
in the UK, so I figured these make sense." Opening
the door for Dan.
lethal in our Western consumer society, you realise
that?" Dan shook his head, laughing. "Buying
all that stuff that no one needs."
We do need this stuff."
pocketed the key and they went down into the lobby,
where the taxi had just pulled up outside. "Let's
see if I remember where to get pissed." Dan told
the driver to take them into the centre of Glasgow,
getting out at the edge of Merchant City.
Russkie, I figure we just walk along until we spot a
Vadim glanced around and stayed close to Dan without
realised all too quickly that he had absolutely no idea
where he was heading, only vaguely remembering the city,
and not having the faintest clue about any hostelries.
Walking on, the last thing he wanted was to lose face
and look like an idiot. Stopping at the sight of a traditional
pub that looked welcoming. The sign said 'Bennett's',
and it was otherwise fairly unremarkable. "What
about this one? Looks good to me."
Take point, I cover your back."
a pub, Vadim, or bar, or whatever you want to call it.
I don't think you need to cover my back." Dan grinned,
as he purposefully walked into the establishment. Heading
straight towards the bar, where a friendly landlord
looked up with a smile. "What have you got on your
pump?" Spotting the 80 shilling before the guy
could point it out to him, Dan ordered two pints straight
away. "Doesn't look too bad, does it?" Quietly
to Vadim with a smile.
glanced around, seeing not quite the regular scruff
he remembered from the pub in Hereford. Most seemed
better groomed, and most were male. There were a few
women, but strangely, these were sitting in pairs. And
most of all, in a country where nobody ever made eye
contact, the majority of the people in the room - that
was, the men - eyed them with interest. In fact, he
was pretty sure there'd been a hush falling over the
room the moment they'd entered. "I sometimes wonder
about your luck", he said, suppressing a laugh.
do you mean?" Paying for the pints, Dan handed
one to Vadim before turning round to face the pub. "The
music's good, the patrons seem to be alright, the landlord's
a good chap, and the beer's from the hand pump. I call
that good luck."
quite. And I doubt any of the men will be going home
with any of the women tonight."
" Dan finally clued on and grinned into the
room, catching a few somewhat interested smiles in return,
despite his scarred face and the look of a man more
dangerous than most. Or perhaps because of. Or maybe
it was Vadim who got the reaction. "Best get ourselves
a table then, aye?" Dan grinned contentedly and
looked around for a seat in the rather busy pub.
scanned the room. "I guess we'll have to share",
he said. "Or wait till some of the guys leave."
But it was early in the evening, still. He really had
no idea how things would go. Only that if the girl in
the hotel had the regional accent, he wouldn't understand
a word that was going to be said. But Dan was right:
the music was good enough and put a little spring in
found a table with a couple of free seats on a comfortable
looking bench. The guys at that table seemed friendly
enough, and willingly shifted closer together when he
asked if there was space. They had just about sat down,
when the first of a barrage of questions started, right
after an introduction of names. He hadn't quite expected
to be taken in within seconds, and grinned at Vadim
with surprise. Gay or not, they were still Brits and
Brits just didn't do outgoing.
two from around here?" One of the guys asked, whose
name was Martin, and whose accent was far easier to
understand that the thick Glaswegian.
really." Dan took a sip of his beer, "we've
just come from Kuwait."
sat close to Dan, part by choice, part by necessity,
and looked around the table, trying to work out the
rules. Meanwhile, he tried the beer. Not something he'd
ever really get used to, he preferred hard stuff to
get drunk, but it was drinkable. "Through London",
Dan nodded, and downed half of his pint.
Are you businessmen?"
shook his head. "Soldiers."
grinned into his pint glass when he heard an audible
intake of breath. "Well, not anymore, technically.
We were. We're mercenaries now." It all came back
to him all of the sudden, the way he'd played the girls,
back in the day, and he added with a gesture of his
scarred hand, "Vadim was spetsnaz, Soviet special
forces, and I was SAS." Smiling innocently as if
he didn't notice the reaction.
taking the piss!" One of the guys exclaimed, but
the way he leaned forward it was more than obvious how
he wanted this to be true.
Dan placed his hand on the table and tiled his head,
so the scar in his face became more prominent in the
light, "or do you want us to show off more of our
" said one of them.
looked between them and thought, how strange, that did
draw instant reactions from pretty much the whole table.
The mix of awe, incredulity, and, he'd swear, interest.
The men were looking at Dan's scarred hand, and they
apparently did believe. He laughed softly, not quite
believing this himself. Suddenly oddly comfortable as
Dan grinned at them, a broad, sharp grin that wasn't
too far away from Dan's whole tiger thing. He shed his
jacket, enjoying Dan's confidence and predatory glee.
To him, the strangest thing was the fact there was no
hiding. Just by being in this place everybody knew they
were gay, and everybody else was gay or looking for
gay company. Vadim looked into the faces and wondered
who was seeking what. "Aye, we have the scars to
prove it", he acceded, pulling the jumper down
a little at the collar, to bare the old burn scar for
that, actually, is mine." Dan said out of the blue,
earning himself some more stares. His predatory grin
increasing in sharpness. "What, you don't believe
me? Want to see the scar where he shot me in the shoulder?"
was a gasp and one of the guys slowly moistened his
lips, while another found his voice. "You really
are taking the piss now."
I?" Dan's brows rose into his hairline. "Since
when were SAS and Spetsnaz friends in the last decade?"
He leaned forward and pulled the neckline of his top
down as far as he could, revealing a glimpse of the
bullet scar and faint lines of some of the others, before
he sat back.
same effect again - more awe, and more interest. Vadim
was sure that they would have free pick amongst the
table if Dan kept this up. They probably already were
free to choose. Likely, all they had to do was point
at a guy and say 'You'. He doubted there would be more
than a second's hesitation. "Let's say, the Cold
War wasn't quite so cold for the two of us", he
murmured, drawing a nervous laugh from the guy called
a dangerous game, fucking a special forces soldier."
Dan commented, lighting a fag.
if he's tied up nice, eh, Dan?"
grin widened, pulling in a lungful of smoke. They'd
never played this game together, had never played any
game in fact, and the effect was like an aphrodisiac.
"Aye, or a blade on his throat or a muzzle in his
back, while getting fucked close to patrol." He
showed his teeth in a sharp grin, while another guy,
who'd introduced himself as John, was turning suspiciously
red. Vadim, too, felt his guts tighten; yes, that fuck.
That near-rape, that thing that could have got Dan killed,
and him disgraced. Oh fuck. The memory never failed
to arouse him, and he was lost for words. Their intimate
history now teasing complete strangers.
the garrotte ensures there's no screaming", Vadim
not ... making this up?"
want me to show you?" Dan dropped his voice
to a dangerous huskiness, and the guys were visibly
torn between yes, please, and no, no, just a joke. Haha.
Shocked, but completely enthralled.
his voice even further, Dan let the smoke escape his
nostrils before he leaned close to the guy who'd asked.
"What it's like to meddle with special forces soldiers
with a wide-eyed stare and a very visible gulp. "I
what?" Dan smiled with all the innocence he could
turned to face Vadim, dropping his hand in his crotch,
without the slightest attempt at hiding as he briefly
stroked Vadim's cock. "Don't think he knows what
he wants, hm?"
saw attention now on him, on the way Dan touched him,
how very visibly Dan aroused him. He wanted to be back
at the hotel now, fucking, getting fucked, as brutal
as they both could manage, celebrate the very thing
that aroused the civilians - their fucking deadliness,
the fact they'd spilt each other's blood. His lips opened,
to say something like that, let's get a taxi, but he
couldn't think that clearly anymore. If Dan kept this
up, they'd end up as the centrepiece of a gay orgy.
He bared his teeth in a fierce grin and leaned in to
bite Dan's neck, hard enough to sting, rolling the muscle
between his teeth.
sucked in his breath, then tilted his head, allowing
a view onto the vicious bite as well as better access.
All eyes around the table were fixed onto them, - attention
growing all around. "Guess we are not
briefly closing his eyes, "in the right place for
" murmured, not that he had the faintest
idea what the right place would be, but the way he felt
right now, a comfortable pub was not it.
could ... " Martin again, clearing his throat,
"try Club X, the only gay club in Glasgow, but
" he never finished his sentence when another
guy, who hadn't said anything but his name yet, finished
it for him.
you could come with us. Martin and I live quite close."
Gordon's voice sounded nervous.
turned his head, Dan's flesh only then slipping out
from between his teeth, which had to sting, but Vadim
could feel what effect that had on Dan. Could see it
in his eyes, the way he breathed, the way Dan opened
his legs. Pushing them apart. Looking at Martin, who
had a rather plain face, but looked fit, and at Gordon,
who did have good features, a fresh, manly attractiveness
that was probably owed to good diet, exercise, and a
healthy dose of vanity. "Sounds more interesting
than our hotel room", murmured Vadim, in Russian,
by way of speaking code. "Do you want them, tiger?"
kept looking at the two men, not Vadim, answering in
Russian, "I want them tied up and sweating, on
their knees, and begging for my cock." And fuck,
he didn't have a clue where that had come from, but
didn't give a damn either. "And I want you to watch
me fuck them," stubbing out the fag, he drew in
a breath. Turning his head to glance at Vadim, then
back at the others, still in Russian, "and then
I want them to suck you off while I fuck you."
stared at him, at that crude, unashamed lust. Dan's
coarse Russian, very much how a soldier would use the
words, went straight into his guts, a knife that aroused
him, badly. It suddenly became ironclad, not just a
possibility, no longer a game. This was moving into
dark territory, and part of him felt the heat rise,
as he just nodded, then turned to the men. "Good",
in English. "But we do play hard."
eyes had gone bug-eyed and he didn't say anything at
all, while his mates stared at him. Gordon, though,
nodded, albeit nervously. "We don't know either
of you. You could be crazy killers."
flashed a grin that was far closer to insanity than
humour. "We are killers, just not of guys
like you and Martin. We're killers because it's our
job, and if you are worried, why don't you take your
friends with you." Gesturing across the table,
the others visibly cringed. None rose to the challenge,
but every single one of them appeared tempted.
thought you liked mercenaries because they aren't
safe", said Vadim. "As we're not wearing the
camo, that's really the only reason, isn't it?"
He leaned in. "If you want the real deal, it's
without in-built security. It's risky, but so's crossing
what do you say? Still up for it?" Dan's dangerous
grin was back, before he emptied his beer.
nodded, quicker than Gordon, his cock had made the decision
nodded, "there's an off-license on the way."
it, then." Standing up, Dan took his time with
the movement, until he stood to his full height. He
was still wearing the jacket, but it only enhanced the
breadth of his shoulders and the solid state of his
body. Not a gram of fat, not anywhere, just muscles.
"Hope you don't mind scars
" he flashed
another grin, before he slipped out of the bench. "Nice
to meet you." To those who stayed behind in silence,
and who only nodded.
gave them a nod, thought that that stunned silence was
part frustration, part envy, part debating whether they
should join, but he assumed Dan had just steamrolled
the whole lot so badly none of them would find his balls
before they were out of the room. Almost light-headed
at how simple this was, meeting up, making people hard,
and then going to somebody else's home. The one time
that had been similar he'd acted like a bloody beginner.
Darren had found him pretty much like a lost puppy,
but he had been weakened by the whole shit. By falling
in love. Now it was Dan and him, on the prowl. He let
Gordon and Martin go first, slipped into his jacket
and murmured: "That was fast
I'm only glad
we did manage some food before we went out."
pissed off I didn't get my pints." Dan grinned,
looked everything but pissed off, horny instead, with
that glint in his dark eyes that Vadim knew too well.
The edge was back, the old Dan, the man who fucked at
about pints later?"
we get back before last orders at 11, I've done something
wrong." Dan grinned shark-like, before heading
out after the guys.
grinned back, the situation really getting to him, but
above all, Dan's recklessness, his pure balls to go
through with it. Two strangers. He walked behind Dan
and gripped his ass on the way out, kneading the firm
muscle, which made Dan slow down, allowing some time,
before they stepped into the street.
and Gordon were waiting for them, hands in their pockets,
jackets zipped up, braving the miserable cold and damp
of Glasgow in late March. Gordon nodded at them, taking
the lead. "It's just about fifteen minutes away
on foot. Is that alright?"
bared his teeth in another kick-ass grin. "Ask
me to march twelve miles with a sixty pound bergan on
my back and I might complain. This here is a doddle."
this place isn't the Afghan mountains", Vadim added,
mostly to hit the same spot as Dan had.
nudged Vadim when Martin's eyes went wide once more,
but the guy said nothing. Seemed the soldier fetish
went deep, and Dan was determined to find out what that
entailed. How well would they obey an order?
went onto their way, saying very little, with an awkward
silence hanging between Martin and Gordon, while Dan
just grinned and walked close to Vadim. Suited them
well, the lack of attempts at conversation. Stopping
over at an off-license a couple streets further down,
they stocked up on booze, then went on until they entered
one of the typical Glasgow streets with impressive turn-of-the-century
buildings, boasting high-ceilinged tenements and granite
fronts. Stopping on the steps in front of the entrance,
while Martin fumbled with the keys.
living together long?"
couple years", said Gordon. "Martin moved
in when he came back from the States."
that mean I'm getting to fuck another Yank? My last
one was a jarhead." Dan grinned.
no, he'd just been working there for a while",
Gordon said, when Martin still didn't manage to get
the steep stairs, finally, with worn steps that betrayed
age. The first floor flat had the high ceilings that
the building had promised, and Gordon led them through
into a large living room that had a fireplace - long
since abandoned in favour of modern heating, the space
now filled by a large plant with leathery, shining green
leaves that stretched as far as the walls on either
stepped inside and shed his jacket. The place was warm
enough, but definitely not overly heated. Looking around,
he watched Gordon switch on some low lights and Martin
busying himself in another room, which seemed to be
the kitchen. Gordon was holding out his hand to take
Dan's and Vadim's jackets, when Dan went straight to
what is it you want? And do you both want the same?"
" Gordon hesitated, glanced over to the kitchen.
"I don't know."
don't know?" Dan raised his brows. "That smells
of bullshit. You got us here, after all, and it seemed
to me you knew damn well what you wanted, back in the
just ... we haven't done this before."
getting fucked by strangers?" Dan flashed a grin.
this." Gordon moved his eyes from Dan to Vadim.
"A couple. And
guys like you. Soldiers.
Mercenaries." He shrugged. "Shit, this whole
thing is a fantasy of mine, and now that you're here,
it's too much in reality?"
shrugged his shoulders, somewhat helplessly, but not
sat down on the couch, watching Martin bring in a tray
with pint glasses of beer and a four-pack of red McEwan's
export cans under his arm, looking up in surprise at
the exchange. Surprise, or nervousness. Vadim didn't
actually want to calm the guy down - it seemed very
much like it was the danger that was attracting them.
The not knowing, with plenty of things going on in their
heads, probably their history as well, the things they
did in bed and that fascination for soldiers. Vadim
leaned back, one arm on the back of the couch, thinking
about what Gordon had said, then nodded.
Finding that speaking somebody's name often put them
at ease while also making them listen. "Question
is, do you want the same thing? I know Dan, I know what
he likes. That's all experience. We don't have that
with you, so we need to know what you like. What you
want." He looked up at Dan. "As Dan knows
what I like
as you guys know what you like. If
we're too much, I get Dan back to the hotel and no hard
feelings." He laughed. "Well, in a manner
grinned at that, surprised when it was Martin who answered,
while he was putting the tray and the cans down. The
quiet one turned out to be the tie-breaker. Again. "Yeah,
we do both pretty much want the same." Standing
closer to his partner, "we do a lot of role-playing,
to keep the sex interesting, you know. And we switch,
but, like, neither of us is really a dom. So we met
someone in Club X, just once, and that guy was into
dominating, so he did it for us."
thought Vadim. Back in the world of confusing concepts,
top, bottom, switch. And the thing Darren had called
him. 'Prime slave material'. "And?" he asked,
shrugged, "was alright, but
Dan couldn't help but grin at Martin's American way
of phrasing things, reminding him of Matt and - if he
talked - Hooch. Not a bad thing being reminded of either
quite the 'real' thing?" Gordon finally found his
easy, then. Tell us about your fantasies. Tell us about
the 'real thing'." Dan took a glass and downed
almost half of his pint. Not bad for a canned beer.
left the beer on the tray for the moment, interested
to hear these strangers' fantasies, but didn't want
to stare. Dan's typical way to just barge ahead. There
was no question really who'd be the 'dom' in this game,
and, if he was honest, he really wanted to see that,
wanted Dan to run this. He studied the bodies, both
fit and trim for civilians. Groomed, better than the
average of what he'd seen of British men so far.
actually managed to turn beetroot red and said nothing,
while Martin quickly went for his pint and buried his
face in the froth. Dan waited for a moment, but when
nothing happened, he finished his pint, put the glass
back onto the tray, and in one swift motion pulled his
top over his head and threw it over the back of the
sofa, then sat down beside Vadim, grinning. Met by two
sets of eyes, staring at him in what seemed either shock
or disbelief at the deeply scarred but perfectly honed
killing machine, with its history and purpose written
all over it. "Still waiting
did it, Gordon finally opened his mouth. "OK."
Muttered, still staring at the body before him. "Shit."
He took his pint and sat down on one of the comfortable
chairs, opposite to the sofa.
worries. Chances are, we've already done it", said
Vadim, softly, feeling Dan's skin warm and close.
we don't get what we want if we don't tell, aye?"
Laughing nervously, Gordon took a few mouthfuls of beer,
while Martin perched on the armrest of his chair. "We've
been talking about this, trying to do it, but when we
play together, it always means that one doesn't get
what he wants." Another mouthful of beer, wiping
his lips with the back of his hand. "And what we
want is not to have any control. We want to
get fucked. Be made to suck." Martin continued.
we want to be tied up. Helpless." Gordon finished,
while Dan was leaning closer, drawn to the words and
the images they conjured.
favourite scene is playing prisoners." Martin added
after finishing his beer, and Gordon nodded. "Can
you do that?"
leaned in to Dan, murmuring into his ear. "Good
choice, these." He stood, liked the eagerness,
the courage of these guys offering to throw themselves
at the mercy of complete strangers. Mercenaries. Killers.
"Dan is good at the prisoner game", he said,
smiling. "Entertained me for a week or two, up
in the Afghan mountains."
looked at him, without saying a word, but with barely
disguised surprise. Vadim slipped his jumper off, tensed
his chest and abs, smiling at Dan. "Only, back
then, he didn't take advantage of that Soviet he'd caught.
I still think that was a bit of a waste." Smiling,
part mocking, part tender.
Dan caught himself when he saw the awed look on the
two guys' faces, as they stared at the perfectly chiselled
body. Smooth, with hardly a scar except for the burn
mark in the hollow of the throat. Dan stood up as well,
placed his hand on Vadim's shoulder.
that time, twelve years ago, I was more into torturing
the Commie bastard." With light pressure getting
Vadim to turn around and present his back.
didn't know which of the guys let out a shocked "shit!"
and who was the one who inhaled a hissed breath, but
both of them, when he turned to look, were moistening
their lips and unable to take their eyes off the scars
on Vadim's back, while Vadim felt it surreal that his
old scars would have that effect. And Dan's hand on
his shoulder felt good. Strong, firm, a commitment and
a trust that would never be touched by anything.
did that?" Martin could hardly get the words out.
did. Hard to explain the scars when I managed to return
to my side." Vadim glanced over his shoulder. "And
I wanted him even then, the fucking bastard." Feeling
the memory heat up his blood again, the memory of torture,
of offering his body to appease the enemy. Well, at
least he wasn't the only one who was horny because of
these old stories. Their faces told the truth. Nice,
turned him around again, stepping half behind Vadim,
only to grope his arse, grinning predatorily, and Vadim
tensing, pressing slightly against him. Ready for anything,
you said. Do you have something to tie you guys up?"
Dan's brows rose. Fortunately, his question wasn't taken
for the ignorance that it was, but the cue for Martin
to jump up.
go get them. They're ... in the bedroom." Vaguely
pointing towards another door, reluctant to take his
eyes off Dan and Vadim.
Dan nodded, not having a clue what on earth 'toys' meant,
wondering if they were going to be presented with a
set of Action Men. That thought made him grin, but he
soon forgot the funny side when he was met with a look
in Gordon's eyes that was so hungry, Dan could almost
taste the need on his palate. He suddenly had an image
in his mind, which made him lean over Vadim's shoulder,
hands busy opening Vadim's fly.
breathed deeply, hands motionless at his sides, being
bared and presented. Fuck. And how much that aroused
want to get fucked. I assume you got condoms, lube,
and get yourselves cleaned out first." Dan's cock
hardened as much at the memory of a fist up his arse,
as Vadim's cock did, freed, in his hand.
said Gordon, staring at Vadim, who struggled to not
speed things up by demanding anything. Anything more.
Gordon left for the bathroom. Dan was stroking Vadim
lightly, leisurely, when Martin returned with a large
wooden box, unsecured, and set it down on the living
room table, right next to the cans of beer.
on Vadim's cock, Martin didn't do anything for a moment,
before opening the box and presenting Dan with the 'toys'
inside, looking up with an eager expression.
grinned briefly, "I will take a look. You better
get into the bathroom, your partner's there."
nodded, visibly swallowing, before his eyes were once
again on the way Dan slowly stroked that cock, and how
Vadim's smooth, pale skin seemed to glow in the low
want both of you naked when you return."
nodded again, tore himself away from the display, and
left for the bathroom. The sound of water running and
loo flushing was heard for a long while thereafter.
" Dan smiled at Vadim when they were on their
own, and he stepped in front of him, suede clad crotch
pressing into Vadim's cock, which made him inhale, deeply.
fuck." Vadim reached for Dan's hips, pressing him
closer for a long moment, just the feeling of leather
have a look at the toys, then, won't we?"
let go of Vadim, about to step to the box, when he turned
back. "And you better get naked yourself, aye?"
glanced over towards the bathroom, unsure what his role
would be. They hadn't negotiated that. But then, they
didn't need to negotiate. He looked at Dan for a long
moment, who smiled at him, and trusted that Dan wouldn't
go too far. Whatever went on in his head. He sat down,
shed the shoes, socks, jeans, underwear, piled it up
neatly, while Dan went through the toys.
shit." Dan let out under his breath. "I've
never seen gear like that." Pulling out restraints,
leather cuffs, harnesses, leather straps with hooks,
buckles and metal fastenings, collars with heavy buckles,
some strange clamps with what appeared to be weights,
something else that made no sense until he turned it
over a couple of times and realised they were two gags
with black silicone mouth bits and holes in them for
breathing. Blindfolds and metal cuffs, some smaller
buckled gadgets that made no sense to him until he figured
out what the metal ring was supposed to do, and a whole
arrangement of dildos and butt plugs. Vadim watched
him, but got the impression that whatever would happen,
Gordon and Martin had, in their own ways, a few experiences
more than they did.
fuck." Dan turned to Vadim, the assortment laid
out on the table. "I think I missed something over
the years." Holding the small metal-ringed leather
straps up. "And I assume this is a cock ring, aye?"
should I know?" Vadim gave a short laugh. "Faced
with all this stuff, I'm completely innocent."
In Russian, though, to not allow their hosts - sex partners
to be - an idea that neither Vadim nor truly Dan had
a clue what they were doing. He picked up something
that looked like it belonged on wrists: soft leather
restraints that could be connected with metal rings
and carabiner hooks.
Dan commented in Russian, switching fluently to English,
"aye." He grinned. "Any idea what this
is for?" Holding up the clamps.
took them from his hand, examined the pressure with
a finger, noticed the blunted edges, like they were
intended for something tender. He nodded. "I know
what I'd use them for. It's a pair - two." He glanced
down at his chest to give Dan the idea.
with too many teeth on show, Dan took the clamps back
and carefully placed them on the table, then returned
some of the things to the box, including the collars,
and kept an assortment of restraints, the cock rings,
and the gags on display. He was exponentially fascinated
with the dildos, keeping all of them out on the table.
for another beer before they return." Opening a
can, Dan poured himself a pint after glancing at Vadim's
glass, still untouched. Patting the seat beside him,
he sat back on the sofa, enjoying his second pint as
Vadim sat down next to him, touching his thigh, hip,
arm, shoulder. Dan leaned closer, letting his hand run
over the smooth skin of Vadim's thighs, then groin,
up to the chest, with Vadim's face twitching as if he
was trying to fight the lust at the touch, tried to
hold back. "Will you do what I tell you tonight?"
Dan murmured with growing huskiness, "or will you
want to be my 'partner'?"
shook his head. "I have
no idea." Prime
slave material, he heard Darren again. How weird that
it came back up and kept echoing in his mind. "What
would turn you on more? I think I could do either."
leaned closer, lips and tongue travelling along Vadim's
shoulder, neck, towards his face. "Are you mine?"
Question answered with question.
am." Vadim turned enough to kiss Dan. Deeply,
passionately, just to show he was getting hungry for
it, the touches and images keeping his lust on a simmering
level. Hands running across Dan's naked chest, arms,
to his powerful neck, the wild hair. "I
will do what you tell me", he murmured into Dan's
ear. "Whatever that is."
smiled against Vadim's skin, no words necessary, kissing
his way to Vadim's lips, deeply once more, possessively.
He was still kissing him, half leaning over Vadim, when
the bathroom door opened and the two guys came back
out. Naked, freshly showered, and sporting hard-ons.
Stopping and staring at the two men on their sofa.
turned to look at them, old soldier reflexes demanded
the need to respond to a change in his environments.
He looked at the guys, appraising them. Not bad. They
both worked out, if less obsessively than both Dan and
him. But he assumed there was more competition to the
gym in Glasgow, and they didn't have the time to work
out in every free minute like they had done, all their
lives. He gave them a nod, acknowledging the men to
put them at ease, and saw them glance at the toys that
were laid on the table - probably trying to assess what
Dan had in store for them. Only that Dan would most
definitely surprise them. Whatever you tell me, he thought
and stood, too, but Dan shook his head and smiled at
him, patting the sofa once more. Not you, the smile
said, you are special.
Dan pointed to the two guys, standing up when Vadim
sat down again. "You wait here. Don't move. You'll
be watched." He turned and walked into the kitchen.
Not hearing a sound, he smiled to himself, as he closed
the door behind him. Rummaging through the kitchen drawers,
he found what he was looking for, and slipped it into
the back of his trousers, feeling the familiar chill
at the small of his back.
he returned to the living room, he glanced at Vadim
for a moment, who sat on the sofa, legs spreads and
one pulled up, displaying the goods, as it were, then
looked at the two guys. "So," slowly stepping
closer, "who owns this flat, then?"
met his gaze. "I do
inhaled, feeling his chest expand at the word. That
word meant so many things, far more than this Gordon
eyes widened, darker than before, but nothing else could
have warned the civilian. Except for Vadim, who'd have
seen muscles tense, the tiger ready for the kill. Dan
moved, fluid motions, a killer who had not lost his
deadly skills, and the next moment Gordon was grabbed
from behind, hands pulled back, the blade of the sharpest
kitchen knife at his jugular.
" Dan hissed, the body in his hands
completely frozen in shock, "and now we play prisoner!"
was transfixed by the glint of steel against flushing
skin, the way Dan handled the strong body, and the way
the man responded to him, remaining hard. His lips twitched
as Dan had borrowed one of his phrases, again refreshing
the memory of their own prisoner 'games'.
was trying to move but Dan barked at him, "Down!
Get the fuck down and Do. Not. Move!"
by the shouting, Martin scrambled to his knees, then
down, flat on his stomach, as Dan kept shouting at him.
Body tense, Martin moved his hands to protect his head,
shuddering, no doubt with fear.
licked his lips and he set the foot down to bend forward,
watching Dan easily handle two men.
Order sharply barked at the man on the floor. "On
your knees, to the table. Bring back what Vadim is handing
you." Dan nodded to Vadim, not needing any words.
They both knew how to restrain a prisoner. They'd been
there, done that, and they'd do it again. Right now.
was hardly breathing, his whole body flushed, heart
hammering against his chest. So strong, Dan could feel
it, the man in his arms like a puppet.
As Martin crawled over on all fours.
carefully selected the restraints - the leather cuffs
- and took a few moments to assemble and connect them,
preparing them to be used. No bruises from these ones,
he thought. He let them dangle in front of Martin's
face, and, following an impulse, he shook his head as
Martin reached for them. "With your teeth",
he said, deceptively softly, but he did hold them up
so Martin could gather both in his teeth and crawl back.
looked at Dan, whose face had changed into a truly frightening
smile, and studied the beauty of a helpless man held
in check by a blade.
onto your belly." Dan's voice deceptively soft
as he felt Gordon's body sweat under his hands. Slick
skin and frightened heartbeat, and yet, when he shifted
the blade in his hands, dropping one hand down to Gordon's
cock, he felt the hard-on. The man had never softened,
and Dan grinned.
dropped the restraints from his teeth and threw himself
onto his belly, lying quivering, with his hands behind
" softly whispered into Gordon's ear, "you
will now restrain him. Nice and tight."
did not move, just breathing, frantic, shallow, as the
knife at his throat twisted gently.
you understand me?" Dan repeated, the blade pressing
closer into the throat. "Nod if you understand
Gordon did, a miniature jerk, and only then did Dan
let him go. Gordon went to his knees, took Martin's
hands, opened the restraints and placed them around
his lover's wrists. Tight, as requested, but making
sure he was still safe.
watched him, lazily stroked himself to keep the arousal.
Something touching about one lover restraining the other,
so Dan could have his wicked ways. He gave a toneless
laugh, part of him knowing he was everything but immune
remained kneeling, head lowered, only shifting slightly
to remain at Dan's feet, but Dan did not touch him,
instead pushed the second set of restraints between
Gordon's teeth, while Martin remained flat on his belly.
over there." Softly, but when Gordon tried to get
up, he sharply ordered, "on your knees!" And
Gordon did, crawling over to Vadim, with the restraints
in his mouth.
him up." Dan smiled, the outline of his cock in
the tight leather trousers hard and obvious. "Then
send him back over to his lover."
nodded, as Gordon already dropped the restraints at
said Vadim, somewhat drawn out. "Into my hand."
Stretching out a hand, forcing Gordon to go down with
his teeth, pick them back up and push them in his hand,
the man's eyes burning with arousal and lust at the
simple game, and Vadim was tempted to pet his head.
"Turn." The man scrambled around, offering
bent down to offer his wrists closer to Vadim, who gingerly
fastened the restraints, and ran his fingers over Gordon's
had got down onto one knee, the blade of the knife whispering
along Martin's spine. Rewarded with a drawn-out whimper,
and a shuddering of the body that started to sweat.
"On all fours." Dan murmured into Martin's
ear. His voice gentle, just allowing himself to go with
whatever came to his mind. "On all fours and legs
spread. Arse in the air."
Martin did, shaking, but getting himself into the position
that Dan demanded, despite not having the support of
his arms. His cock as hard as Gordon's had been, he
knelt like a dog. Head low, face pressed against the
floor, shoulders down, trying to keep them off the ground,
arse high, and thighs spread.
Dan smiled, the dangerous smile of a predator, "don't
you think?" To Vadim, while the blade caressed
Martin's spread arse, causing his whimpers to intensify.
nodded and spoke close to Gordon's ear. "I think
he looks very needy, your prisoner, Dan." The Russian
accent really now only there to fuck Gordon's mind.
"Now, head on over
Gordon did, without hesitation, but with difficulty
to keep himself on his knees, his hands were bound in
his back. Just like his lover's, his cock was rock hard.
him." Dan ordered, softly, nudging Martin's head
up from the ground when Gordon came to a halt. Face
to face, until they touched each other. Held in the
stress position by nothing but the strength of their
thigh muscles. The way Dan had arranged them they were
perfectly presented to Vadim on the couch.
Dan murmured, when they didn't comply immediately, he
delivered a hard slap onto Martin's arse, who yelped,
and Gordon reacted the same way, his arse slapped hard
by Dan's hand. "I said, kiss! And don't dare to
stop, whatever happens."
needed no more encouragement, desperately clinging onto
the other's lips while their bodies shook with the effort
of staying in the position, no hands to support themselves.
grinned, watched them for a moment, before slipping
the knife back into the waistband of his trousers. Walking
over to the table, he stopped in front of Vadim, who
straightened again, gazing up at Dan.
them." Dan smiled, tenderness in his voice despite
the order, as he took one of the dildos in his hand,
stood, picked up the lube, while Dan sat to take off
shoes and socks, but the skin-tight leather trousers
stayed on. He was the only one partially dressed, and
he didn't know why, just that it felt right.
two others were still kissing, just as ordered, and
Vadim considered who to 'prepare' first. Probably Gordon.
He squirted some of the cool stuff in his hand, nudged
Gordon's legs further apart with a bare foot, then brought
the lubed up hand to his ass, pushed a thumb in and
felt the man shudder, but welcome him. Gordon groaned
as Vadim pushed more lube in with two fingers, pushing
them in and out, quickly, with power, which made Gordon
push back, clearly willing. The heat and tightness inviting,
clean, prepared. Vadim grinned at Dan. "This one's
ripe." He slapped Gordon's ass, harshly, after
he'd pulled out, and Dan grinned in reply, picking up
a 'toy' of his choice. Two butt plugs, or, dildos to
his mind, that would stay where they were supposed to
then moved over to Martin, who tensed when he pushed
in, none too tender. Pushing deep and hard with the
slicked up fingers, using less lube in this case, which
elicited another yelp from the younger guy. "Don't
worry, you'll get fucked well tonight", he said
to Martin, added more lube and again pushed in and out,
with strength, really just to prepare him and drive
home the humiliation. "Yes?"
Sir", Martin managed to get out, but he'd
forgotten about the order and Dan, who was standing
between Gordon's legs.
I tell you to stop kissing?" Dan demanded.
him." Dan murmured, looking at Vadim, dark eyes
as intense as the day he'd cut a word into flesh. "make
him feel it, and make him watch in return. Make them
understand they are doing this to their lover."
Holding the second butt plug out to Vadim, who took
it, still behind Martin.
heard him", Vadim whispered into Martin's ear,
as he slicked up the toy that felt quite thick in his
hand, thick and heavy, and positioned it at the younger
guy's ass. He'd have loved to fuck him now, to 'punish',
yes, hard and fast, and his breath accelerated. Slowly
pressing in, Martin tried to pull back, but Vadim held
him down with the other hand, almost doubled him over
with pure strength until Martin very nearly kissed the
floor. Ass bared, helpless, open to the assault, and
Vadim relished the shudder and the way the guy's breath
sounded forced as the dildo went in. Deep, against resistance
and probably causing discomfort, but Vadim understood
well how he would welcome that pain of being stretched
and taken. And, he was right, Martin did push back eventually,
with gritted teeth, until the thing was firmly lodged
too, cried out when the dildo was forced inside his
body, breaching a hardly prepared muscle. Dan pulled
back and pushed deeper, getting fucked mercilessly by
the makeshift cock, until the thick girth was embedded
as deeply in the tense body as it could. Staying there,
held in place by the tight muscle itself.
looked up to Dan, eyes resting for a moment on Dan's
cock inside the tight leather. Half breathless, half
expectant, lips and throat dry again. "Sir?"
smiled, a sudden recognition, a moment of eyes and soul
laid bare and open. Mountains. Heat. Blood. Blades.
Mercy and want. Dust and desert. A lifetime of extremes.
down." To Vadim, who sat back, also on his knees
now, but still free to move his hands. Turning to the
others, who were struggling to stay on their knees.
"Keep him hard. Kiss, suck, lick. Don't touch,
" suddenly a thought, "don't look."
at Vadim, who seemed surprised, especially as Gordon
dipped down to lick his cock, which made Vadim groan,
made him want to take Gordon's head and impale him on
his cock. It took all his willpower not to do that,
especially as Martin went down, too, both men licking
and sucking, but none quite taking him in. Vadim's lips
opened and he tried hard not to move. Closed his eyes,
couldn't bear watching them run their tongues down his
length, especially when Martin went up his body, taking
his nipple between his teeth, expertly sucking and chewing.
went to the table and retrieved the blindfolds. "Here
" as if he were cooing to a dog, "come
" He stood near to
Vadim, who turned his head, eyes closed, reaching for
Dan's leg and pulled him closer, unable to speak, as
every word would betray he was getting desperate. Martin
and Gordon looked up, and Dan knotted the blindfolds
over their eyes.
him." He ordered. "Kiss him. Worship his body,
but Do. Not. Make. Him. Cum." And he stepped away,
almost jumped to his feet when suddenly a hot mouth
opened for his cock. Slowly, so very slowly taking him
in, while lips were pressed to his. He didn't care which
one of them, didn't want to look at them, was just kissed,
and tasted. The other guy's need obvious, hunger and
tenderness merging. It was really too much - no way
he could even look at Dan, or protest, as the sensations
threatened to just overwhelm him. He found a straining
cock, pumping whichever of the two, and felt them press
close, taking turns sucking him incredibly, excruciatingly
Softly. "No mercy." Whispered, lightly slapping
Vadim's hand away from the guys' cocks, while a blade
ghosted across Vadim's throat, which made him freeze,
and shudder. Just the memory of knife, and Dan, and
heat, while both guys were now on his cock and balls.
Vadim felt his control slip, felt he was starting to
lose it, all he wanted was to cum, and be fucked, ideally
both. He stretched his throat and groaned as one of
those cunning bastards sucked on his balls.
you want to get fucked?" Dan whispered in Russian.
Lips caressing Vadim's ear.
In English. Vadim couldn't beg, but he was ready to
beg, would have begged.
you want to be on all fours, being watched?" Still
you suck me off if you could?
winced, dizzy with lust, interrogator and Dan moving
into one, but he was too far gone to be scared, or nervous,
or even ashamed. Dan. Safe. Whatever happened. He opened
his lips, moaned as he felt teeth on his balls, and
nodded, just that. Nodded again, wanted to say yes,
but didn't trust his voice.
" Russian once more.
Not that he could.
didn't interfere with the two guys, still blindly sucking,
kissing and licking, went to the box instead. His hand
hovered over leather and steel, glancing back at Martin
and Gordon, before a slow smile spread across his face.
That would do it, and nicely so. He returned to the
tableau, slipping a leather collar around Martin's throat
first, who groaned, but did not dare to make any other
sound. Dan pulled the buckle snug, closed it, then did
the same to Gordon, who was tensing, but like Martin,
merely let out a suppressed sound while continuing to
lick Vadim's balls, with Vadim flushed and sweating,
taut with lust.
leaned down, fixed a carabiner hook onto each of the
D rings on the collars, then looked at Vadim with a
smile, who met his gaze, unsteady as the sensations
were threatening to wash him away, but unable to cum
from this treatment.
" Dan hooked his fingers into the back of
the collars and pulled the men away from Vadim, who
shuffled unsteady on their knees. Arranging the men
to face each other, still blindfolded, he stroked their
sweat damp hair briefly. "Aren't they pretty? I
wonder how much they love each other
and I think
I'm going to find out."
cleared his throat, knew that breathing was the answer,
like with any kind of pressure, or pain. Breathing was
the key, and he fought hard to keep it under control,
but he wanted to cum, badly. "They are
And they were. Both men looked very nearly the same
now. Short, sweaty hair, their personalities washed
away by the primal response to lust, their features
made anonymous by the blindfolds.
smiled once more, his lips twisting into a grin after
a moment, when he went back to the table and picked
up a few items before returning to Gordon's back. "They'll
be even prettier
his thumb into the corner of the man's mouth, who was
forced to open it, Dan pushed the gag between Gordon's
lips and teeth. Securing the leather straps with a buckle
in the back of the head. Gordon whimpered, a suppressed
sound, as breath hissed through the breathing hole in
do you think about him, isn't he even better now?"
Dan murmured, looking at Vadim as he walked into Martin's
back, repeating the treatment. Vadim stared, his throat
tight just from watching Dan apply the gags, and his
easy way of keeping the men under control. Not a moment
of hesitation, nor shame.
men gagged, Dan pulled metal items out of his pocket.
"Too curious to find out what those are like
down, but never obscuring Vadim's vision, Dan fitted
the first of the clamps onto Martin's nipple, who let
out a tortured whimper, but his cock jerked nevertheless.
Vadim couldn't help watch their reaction, notice how
they enjoyed it, how, again, discomfort and lust mixed.
Dan gave these out so easily. Continuing without a word,
Dan finished Martin, then went onto Gordon, who was
trembling and visibly straining to try and understand
what was going on, but soon enough the clamps were biting
into his swollen nipples, and he breathed harshly, body
covered in a sheen of sweat, and Vadim winced in sympathy.
his work, Dan stood back, glanced at the two men who
were kneeling opposite each other, before he walked
back to the chest. "With those as the finishing
touch?" Picking up the cockrings made of leather
were beautiful things, perfect, and Vadim nodded, fighting
hard to get even a semblance of reason. "What
what are you planning?"
them to watch you." Dan's smile didn't seem entirely
sane, as he waved Vadim over, holding the cockrings
out to him. "But first
fix them." They
might not have seen such things before, but they weren't
ex special forces for nothing.
the leather and steel items over, Dan leaned down between
the two men, commenting quietly, "that would look
so much better without hair. Shame we haven't got time
to shave you
" Resulting in a violent jerk
by Gordon, which brought the collar closer to Dan's
hand and he took the hook in one. Martin's whimper stopped
abruptly, when he took the hook of that collar in the
other, and pulled him sharply closer.
shuddered, the build-up killed him, and he'd thought
a shift in the Iraqi desert was bad. This was much worse.
At work, he had to focus, and time passed quickly when
he was focussing, but this, while it couldn't have been
going for longer than half an hour, killed him. He reached
for Martin's cock first, pulling him close by his cock
and slipping the thing over the hot flesh, pumping him
once, twice, for good measure. Then over to Gordon,
who turned his face blindly towards him as Vadim fixed
the cock ring as well, feeling the man shiver with need
when he touched him and rolled his balls in his hand.
lovers, aye? It's time to prove it." Hooking the
carabiners together, Dan caused the helpless men's faces
to touch each other, unable to kiss, the thick leather
of the heavy gags preventing any contact.
remained on his hands and knees, watched the two guys,
close but powerless, and couldn't help but want them.
Them, Dan, anyone, really. He'd fuck either of them,
or Dan, but that was out of the question. He'd get fucked,
and he hoped it would be by Dan. But, truth be told,
it didn't matter all that much right now - anybody would
do, as horny as he was.
looked intensely at Vadim, the heat rising with every
heartbeat. Impossibly hot, unbelievably ready. This,
here, for which he didn't have a name yet, it was driving
him half insane with lust. Something inside of him,
though, remained strangely detached and cool, knowing
exactly what he was doing, which steps to take. Each
second of control, every suppressed whimper, and each
touch of sweat-slicked skin felt right.
on the blindfolds, Dan leaned down, his husky voice
a mere whisper. "Watch
" and as the
blindfold came off, the two guys tried to move their
heads, but their collars were hooked so closely together,
they could only move in tiny increment and in perfect
moment Dan stepped over to Vadim, his whole attention
was on his lover, ignoring the others. Nudging Vadim
until he knelt on all fours, cock hard, weeping, as
hard as it could possibly be.
you got any idea how fucking perfect you are?"
Dan's husky voice washed over feverish skin. Retrieving
the lube, he took his time to caress Vadim's head, face,
his neck, moving so close, his leather clad crotch nuzzled
into Vadim's face, and Vadim opened his lips to trace
Dan's cock with his teeth, ready to take it, lips, ass,
me. Fuck me. Fuck me, Sir." The last sentence was
spoken rough, gentle, with a hint of humour but no less
soldier." Dan caressed Vadim's face,
before stepping between his legs that opened further.
Cold lube on his hand, he took his time preparing Vadim,
who pushed back with every motion as slow, sure, fingers
opened him and slicked him up, while the bound onlookers
were making small suppressed noises, desperately trying
to see everything.
fingers were a good start, Vadim thought, but they didn't
move deep enough, not enough power, not nearly enough
force. He lowered his head, stared at the floor underneath
without seeing anything, focussed on his ass, Dan's
fingers, and what he needed, above all.
opened his fly, allowing his hard cock to spring free
at last, then reached to his back, pulled the knife
out, almost in an afterthought. The blade whispered
along Vadim's spine, who immediately understood what
it was. Remembering the knife, and his body froze, especially
as the cool tip lay in the hollow of the small of his
back, as Dan positioned his lubed-up cock. "Ready,
'soldier', the knife was there, but not dangerous, more
like a promise, or was it? Vadim didn't mind either
way, if Dan wanted to cut him, alright, he'd take it,
as long as he finally fucked him. "Yes, Sir",
Dan did, knowing each other so well, he knew exactly
what Vadim could take, how fast, how deep, and always
a bit more. Pushing further and harder to go beyond
well known limits, Vadim met him with every thrust.
Legs spread wide, tensing to add friction, and that
pain of being stretched like that, but he was really
beyond pain. Dan fit him so well, still using so much
strength that Vadim could feel every thrust in his bones,
groaning harshly when Dan got him just right, his body
tensing in a futile attempt to achieve orgasm.
groaned, feeling the eyes of the bound guys fixed onto
them. Fucking Vadim, but never quite fast enough, never
touching, never quite hard enough, never enough for
Vadim to cum, while Dan got closer and closer.
was soaked in sweat, getting so desperate he was close
to try taking those thrusts just with one hand on the
floor, finishing himself off, but he wouldn't have the
balance, not with Dan's strength. Desperate, and getting
worse, the arousal approaching anguish. "Dan
Dan laughed, a short, breathless sound, and slowed down,
no matter how difficult it was. His own body thrumming,
sweat running down his temples, down to the small of
his back. Control, not just over the others, but over
himself as well.
shuddered, bit his lips not to beg. Didn't want to beg,
but into that struggle he heard Dan's voice. "Come
" to the others, who laboured hard to
shuffle closer, while Dan moved within Vadim. Tiny increments,
as slow as he could without screaming in frustration,
and, again, making it worse for Vadim who'd have done
anything to force him, force his release. The two men
reached them at last, and while Dan's cock remained
buried deep inside Vadim's arse, he unsnapped the gag
bits that had been kept in place, pulling them from
between desperately clenched teeth. "Get him off."
Two faces staring at him, jaws half-hidden by black
leather, but mouths free, necks locked together. "He's
clean. Suck him. Cock, balls." Pulling out, slowly
so slowly, until he remained poised, merely the head
still clenched by Vadim's arse. "Get him off!"
strangled groan came from Vadim at that order, his cock
twitched, but still not enough. A hair's breadth away,
impossibly close and yet not enough. Martin and Gordon
scrambled to obey, strangled sounds from their throats
as they managed to somehow get beneath Vadim, despite
bound hands and the collars pulling viciously on each
other's throats as they moved. Dan knew when their mouths
had reached their goal, because Vadim's whole body shuddered,
and he slammed that very second back inside. That was
too much, the added sensation, that exact moment brought
Vadim over the edge, with one mouth on his cock and
sucking, another mouth busy with his balls - it wouldn't
have been enough to get him there on their own, but
that thrust did it, pulled the trigger, and with a strangled
half moan half cry, Vadim came, thrust towards the other's
faces, the motions near powerless, pure reflex.
rode into the mindless release, letting lose and casting
away control. Forgetting about anything but the body
beneath his hands and the tight heat clenched around
his cock, convulsing. Only a few more thrusts, and he
crunched his eyes shut for a moment, tensed until all
muscles stood taut, and came, deep inside Vadim, the
out, Dan fought to regain his breath, but the first
words, while his hands were still on Vadim's hips, caressing,
were as sharp as before. "Get back!"
and Gordon fell over when they tried to obey, struggling
to get back onto their knees, but unable to find their
balance. The two men were a heap of limbs and desperate
sounds, their cocks so thick and hard, their balls so
dark in colour, they seemed close to exploding.
hadn't tucked himself in yet, when he leaned close to
Vadim, kissed the shivering body, thighs, buttocks,
base of the spine, which relaxed under the caresses.
Vadim sank down to lie there, stretched out, unable
and certainly unwilling to move.
returned to the others, spent cock in his open fly.
He didn't say anything as he pulled them back up to
kneel once more. Ignoring the others, he turned his
head to smile at Vadim, who regarded him, head tilted
his way, glancing over his arm that lay close to his
face. Dan's voice was tender, "get washed up when
you're ready. I'll follow shortly."
the guys knelt once more, face to face, whimpering at
the way the weights pulled on tender nipples, Dan retrieved
the gags. He didn't use force this time, simply murmured
with a sated voice, "take them." And they
did. Mouths opened willingly to allow the gags back
between their teeth, Dan snapped them shut, the blindfolds
closed his eyes for a moment, acknowledging the order,
but didn't want to move, not just yet. Breathing for
a little while, he slowly managed to get his hands on
the floor and pushed himself up, into a crouch. Then
standing, ass sore, but feeling great, tired, sated,
he managed to find the bathroom.
looked down at Martin and Gordon with that odd smile,
caressing each head and the short damp hair, before
he followed Vadim into the bathroom.
Vadim just flushed the toilet and started the water.
He filled his hands with the cool, clean liquid and
washed his face, running a wet hand across his neck,
down to his pecs, then looked around. "I
Seeing Dan, he stopped, and smiled. "Adore you."
was about to laugh at the words, but the laughter got
stuck in his throat and he tilted his head, smiling.
"Why?" Reaching for the tap with hot water
to clean himself up.
only stepped out of the way enough to allow Dan to wash
himself, lips finding Dan's hot skin, smelling the fresh
sweat, and his hair. "Because
you can make
this stop." Vadim touched his temple. "You
can kill all thoughts, all memories."
shut the tap off, dried his cock and tucked himself
back in, biding his time. Turning back to Vadim, he
raised his hand and touched the temple at the same place,
caressing the short hair. "All bad memories?"
leaned in to kiss Dan's wrist. "Everything. Those,
too. I don't care about them anymore, and then they're
gone." He placed a hand on Dan's ass and pulled
him close and around enough, to kiss him. "You
" he murmured, "would blank out the
sun, Dan. Everything."
himself to be kissed, Dan held Vadim close, stroking
the smooth skin, before pulling back a little, murmuring,
"I think we can have a lot more fun with those
winked, placing another kiss onto Vadim's lips. "And
I know exactly what I want to do to them. As I asked
before, how much do they love each other?"
they're going to ask themselves that question tonight."
Dan grinned, stepping away, but his hands remained connected
with Vadim. "When we get back, I want you to remain
silent when I separate them, and make sure the blindfolds
stay on. Take Martin and prepare him on the couch. I
bet those bound arms in his back are going to kill the
guy. Civilians and all that." Dan flashed his teeth
in an evil grin.
laughed. "Okay. I think I'll manage. And then?
What's your plan?"
want him on his back, legs up and open, find something
to restrain him, because you're going to fuck him with
their nice selection of dildos, since they seem to be
so fond of them
briefly closed his eyes, grinning. "Poor bastards.
And they've been really nice to us. Especially to me."
that's what they want." Dan smiled with another
tilt of his head. "And because of that we are extremely
nice to them by doing what we'll be doing. Aye?"
He patted Vadim's buttock.
Gordon seems to react that much to knife and danger,
he'll get what he wants, too." Dan winked, then
opened the door, placing a finger onto his lips before
they stepped out of the bathroom.
two guys were still kneeling in almost the same way
as before, their bodies under extreme tension. Dan nodded
to Vadim, then stepped to the bound men and unhooked
the collars, before turning away. Vadim moved in, placed
his fingers between Martin's throat and his collar and
pulled him with him. Martin doubtlessly thought it was
Dan, and followed, insecure in his movements like he
was expecting to collide with something, but Vadim just
pulled him towards the couch.
head was going wildly into all directions, trying to
gauge what was happening, but Martin's presence was
Vadim nudged Martin onto the couch, then held him there
for a moment, by his shoulders. "Don't move",
Vadim said tonelessly against Martin's ear, then rifled
through the box. There were leather restraints and more
stuff. He saw something like ankle cuffs, but that wasn't
quite what he was looking for. A moment's thought as
he worked through the kind of thing he needed, and,
sure enough, found it in the box. It was a leather piece,
long, with two hoops that could be tightened, and Vadim
slipped the hoops around Martin's legs, up over his
knees, then pulled the middle part over Martin's nice,
toned neck, before he took mercy and uncuffed Martin's
wrists. "Don't move", he warned again, just
as tonelessly, discarding the cuffs for a moment. "Lie
down, on your back."
lay down on the couch, struggling to orientate himself,
moving very carefully, but then lay down. Vadim got
between his legs, adjusted the leather straps that brought
Martin's legs up, close to his chest, the weight of
his legs supported by his neck. Vadim caressed the straining
cock, gathered a drop of precum from the tip and rubbed
it all around the crown. Martin whimpered, but Vadim
walked around him and merely put the cuffs back on,
in the front this time. There was nothing he could fix
him to, which was a shame, and Vadim frowned, thinking
if there was a way around it. There was another long
leather strip, with a carabiner hook and he connected
the cuffs again, pulled the arms up over Martin's head,
and hooked the cuffs to the strip which he tied around
the couch leg, shortening the strap to stretch Martin
out and curve his back nicely.
was watching, eyes fixed on the sight, and something
deep, dark and full of lust once again stirred inside
of him. The sight, the helplessness, and a body laid
out for whatever they were going to dish out on it.
He walked to the table, Gordon's head following the
sound, but unable to make anything out. Dan picked up
the lube and chose a dildo from the selection, by no
means small and he wouldn't go near Vadim with that
thing, but those guys seemed to be well into that sort
of play. He stooped to pick up his knife, then handed
dildo and lube to Vadim, grinning at him like a predator.
"Take out his butt plug, and prepare him to get
fucked with that thing." Dan whispered tonelessly
in Russian, for only Vadim to hear, adding, "but
don't make him come!" Then walked back to stand
behind Gordon, who was getting more and more agitated
and whimpered into his gag.
glanced at the size and thought that would take quite
a bit of work, then nodded to Dan. He ran a finger around
Martin's stretched muscle that kept the dildo inside,
which caused more shuddering breaths, and shifting,
but there was very little Martin could do in that stance.
The sound when Vadim freed the dildo and pulled it out
- slowly, working mostly with the natural resistance
of Martin's body, was unlike any before. Like Martin
expected the torture to end now, and welcomed that,
and, at the same time, really wanted it back. Vadim
looked over at Dan, grinned when he saw the downright
unpleasant expression in Dan's eyes, a kind of fierce
put the plug away, squeezed plenty of lube into his
hand, rubbing it into the reddened, stretched ass, doubtlessly
cool and cooling, and at the same time promising more.
He reached for another dildo on the table, in size between
the one Dan had given him and the one that he'd just
removed, and slid it in, in one quick motion, making
Martin groan and tense, resist as he was stretched further.
tried to talk into the gags, desperate sounds as his
head moved towards the sofa, clearly disturbed by his
partner's groans. The cock ring ensured that his hard-on
remained as before, despite the obvious agitation. Dan
did nothing, though, stood absolutely still, while watching
the guy on the couch being used and wanting more. Oddly
touched by Vadim's choice of the smaller dildo, and
wondering if he had been too reckless, but the way Martin
pushed towards the intrusion, his cock and balls almost
purple, the frantic sounds he was making, he knew there
wasn't a limit. Not yet, not even close.
Vadim's merciful stroke ended when Martin had fully
accepted that size - that was when he lost the dildo,
again to be left empty and needy, as Vadim moved to
the bigger size, the one Dan had given him. Pressure
and moving slowly, but, much like Dan sometimes did,
with no mercy, no hesitation, giving Martin only the
choice to take it. He winced at the size and the way
it made Martin look, shameless and degraded in complete
abandon, taking the huge thing.
still did nothing, watching, allowing the heat to pool
in his guts once more, until Gordon twitched when Martin
let out a particularly desperate noise, trying to shuffle
towards them. That was when Dan struck, lightening fast
like before, the killer once more on the prowl and killing
his prey. In one fluid motion jerking Gordon up in a
choke hold, pulling the blindfold off the disorientated
man, and pressing the blade against his throat. Almost
breaking skin, right beneath the collar. "Keep
still!" Dan hissed, and the body in his arms froze.
glanced over, a wicked grin at Gordon's obvious panic,
and he pushed the dildo in harder, smiling at Gordon
with something like glee. He was fucking this guy's
partner, and they all enjoyed the sight.
at him." Dan murmured, hardly above a whisper,
and yet his voice seemed loud in a room where nothing
but Martin's hissing breath was heard, as he frantically
breathed through his nose. "Look closely at your
lover. Look how that thing enters his body. Look
how his arse is stretched." Gordon's eyes widened
even more and his whole body shuddered, no matter how
hard he tried to keep himself under control, with the
blade an all too real threat. "We can fuck your
lover until he goes insane with need, and never allow
him to cum. Or we can grant him release." Shifting
the grip of the knife handle, the blade pushed harder
against the throat, and yet Dan handled it with that
much perfection, it never broke skin. Nevertheless Gordon
didn't dare to swallow. "I asked you before ...
I ask you again. How much do you love him?" Pausing,
while Martin let out choked screams behind the gag.
"Do you love him enough to bleed for him? Do you
love him enough to convince us to let him cum?"
saw every muscle on Gordon's body stand out at the question,
the man's eyes wide, rolling like that of cattle trapped
in a thunderstorm, as he clearly thought he'd get his
throat cut in exchange for Martin's release. Dan had
a way to put mortal fear into a man, part the knife,
part his voice. Gordon shook so hard he'd need a steadying
hand soon, as he said something against the gag, something
that was pleading, and tears came to his eyes as he
tried to nod and
you love him enough." Dan nodded to Vadim, a strangely
tender expression on his face, which was almost immediately
replaced by vicious lust, as Vadim set about making
Martin cum. Martin, who was screaming into his gag,
as if trying to stop this insanity and keep his lover
from sacrificing himself, but his body had other thoughts.
He was too helpless, too far gone, and too lost in pleasure
and pain as Vadim drove the dildo in harder and faster
now, absolutely positive that Martin could take no more,
then, with the dildo deep inside, he took Martin's cock
in his hand, unwilling to suck him off. It didn't take
more than one strong, hard, slick stroke to make Martin
scream mindlessly into the gag, hips moving, cock twitching
and shooting his load. Across his chest, over Vadim's
hand, very nearly passing out, while Vadim carefully
removed the dildo.
was crying and whimpering, held up in Dan's arms, his
body both tense and shaking, cold sweat rolling down
his skin, as the blade whispered once, twice, across
his throat. Dan applied more pressure into the choking
hold, leaning down without Gordon realising, whose eyes
had rolled back into his head. He was paralysed with
fear, clearly convinced he was about to die, when Dan's
hand touched him, took his cock.
still between Martin's legs, watched how Dan's hand
brought Gordon off with one single touch. The stimulation
was so extreme, Gordon nearly passed out when he convulsed.
The blade left his throat while he came, and the arms
that had been merciless before, were keeping him now
in a secure embrace, gently lowering the shuddering
body to the ground, where Dan knelt beside him.
to get you two some quality time together, hm?"
He murmured, immediately starting to strip the toys
off the trembling man, who hadn't quite cottoned on
that he wasn't dead and had just had the most mind-blowing
orgasm ever. Vadim did the same for Martin, removing
the straps, clamps, the gag, too, and felt a strange
tenderness that made him lean over the young man and
wipe his face, caressing him, the jawline, the thundering
pulse under the skin. Alive, blown away.
I guess these two should go into the bedroom",
smiled, crouching down to take Gordon's collar off,
caressing the throat as he did, and smiling at the tear
streaked face when Gordon finally opened his eyes. "You
really did think I'd kill you." He murmured, before
giving in to the impulse and kissing the man, whose
lips moved against his, as if Dan still owned him. "Silly
civilians." Whispered, before he came back up and
helped Gordon to sit, taking the restraints off the
wrists, before helping him to move across to his lover.
" Gordon's voice was rough and dry, "you
shook his head and placed a finger onto his lip to hush
the other. "It's what you wanted."
stared incredulously at him, but finally lowered his
eyes and nodded once. They reached the couch the moment
Vadim lowered Martin's legs. It took a moment before
the younger man regained some coherence, turned his
head and looked at Gordon, smiling feebly. Dan didn't
think he'd ever seen anything quite so emotional, when
Gordon wrapped his arms around his partner, caressing
each other's faces with their own.
moved back, as silently as if he'd had to leave the
vicinity of a guard out on patrol. He went into the
bathroom and poured hot water over two towels, wrung
them, then rolled them up, and took two dry towels,
Dan cleared his throat, but forgot to say whatever he
had meant to say, instead opening a couple of the remaining
beer cans. Pushing one into each of the men's hands.
"Guess you're thirsty, aye?"
returned a few moments later and handed one damp towel
each to the guys, and one dry, giving them time to clean
up after they'd quenched their thirst. The living room
was a mess, but Vadim supposed they'd done that before.
He slipped into his jeans and sat down on the other
couch - the one that didn't have Martin and Gordon all
over each other, shaken, tender, and he looked at Dan.
Like they'd been when their soldiering had cut too close
to the bone. For his part, he couldn't help but smile,
a tired, sated smile that betrayed there was no darkness
left in him. Right now, he was a man who relished in
being sated and tired, with nothing haunting him.
smiled back, giving a small nod before he got up from
his crouching position. Walking over to Vadim, he let
the guys clean each other up. He sat on his heels between
Vadim's legs, looking up. "Guess we should be leaving,
aye?" His arms went around Vadim's waist.
regarded him from under heavy lids, cool blue eyes serene
and placid. "Four is big for any bed", he
murmured. "Three works, four is plenty. And I'm
did you enjoy it?" Barely murmured, ignoring the
whisper from the couch when he added, impossible to
be overheard by the others. "Before you ask, I
have no idea where all of that came from."
flashed a quick smile. "I do, Dan. I know where
that's from." He shook his head, still smiling.
"You had it with you all the time. Maybe we haven't
changed all that much?"
tensed, his eyes searching Vadim's. "Are you saying
I'm back in the mountains, cutting your flesh?"
shook his head. "I'm saying it takes a lot of strength
to control a man, body and soul. Get into his head.
Fuck his mind. You fucked mine. You fucked three guys
tonight, Dan." Vadim raised a hand and touched
the side of Dan's face, who smiled, pulling him closer.
"But you no longer destroy."
bloody glad I
grew up." Dan's smile became
even more tender, tilting his head to touch Vadim's
forehead with his own.
switched to Russian. "But I don't doubt for an
instant that Gordon would have cum if you had
cut his throat."
low chuckle escaped his throat and Dan's smile turned
into a grin. "There is that, and it reminds me
of a certain Russkie." Lifting his head, he smirked
with all of his teeth on show.
have been the worst possible death
grinned back and yawned before reaching down to find
his socks and shoes, forcing Dan to let go of the contact.
He put them on, then stood to pick up his jumper, while
Dan stretched, standing, looking for his top.
Call us a taxi back? I could use some shut-eye."
Vadim gave another glance at the guys, who were still
hugging and kissing, and would probably not stop for
a long while yet. "Or maybe there were taxis in
front of that pub?"
was about to say something when Martin lifted his head
and shifted on the couch with a wince, until he got
into a sitting position. In discomfort, but smiling.
So sated, he looked as if he'd drop off any second.
"Wait. We'd just like to say something."
slipped the jumper over his head and raised his brows,
Gordon nodded. "This was the most amazing thing
ever. So fucking amazing, it blew our minds. Martin
younger guy took over, "we were wondering if you
are going to come back by any chance? If we could meet
grinned. "That's Dan
an instant success."
He gave another laugh, shaking his head, deeply amused.
Of course Dan was irresistible. Mad Dog Dan, the reckless
SAS bastard. He looked almost mockingly at Dan, who
was scratching his head. "I guess we'll come through
this city on the way back." If you want them. I'm
" Dan fished for his fags, absolutely desperate
by now, but he hadn't seen any ashtrays, and smoking
hadn't been on his mind. "Aye, we could come back
here. We're off to the Highlands tomorrow, for about
a week or so, and then back down along the East Coast,
before heading into England. That's
his watch and the dates, "two weeks, so we could
be back here by the following weekend." One and
a half weeks, plenty of time.
Martin grinned from ear to ear, and Gordon nodded. "How
much time do you have?"
glanced at Vadim, "what do you mean?"
could stay the weekend." Gordon ventured, "you
" hesitating, "24/7."
glanced at Vadim again, this time his eyes had widened
in an almost comical display of 'not getting it'.
added, helpfully, when Dan didn't reply. "Slaves.
For a weekend. We like to be, like, dominated. You know
It took Dan a while before the grin returned to his
surprised face, and he looked at Vadim, switching to
Russian again. "Do you want that? A game of more
than a couple of hours?"
ask so nicely for it", murmured Vadim. "And
yes, I'd try this again." He moved over to Dan,
placing a hand on his shoulder, squeezing it. "No
Dan nodded. "We'll be back." His grin was
answered by both men, and Gordon got up with some effort,
walking over to a sideboard to fish for pen and paper,
scribbling down their address and phone number.
a deal, aye?" Handing the paper to Dan, who pocketed
we'll call the day before."
Gordon held his hand out to both of them in a touchingly
formal way. "Thank you. Oh, and do you want a taxi?"
but I'm fucking starving, will grab a kebab on the way
to town and get one there."
Gordon smiled and shook Vadim's hand, who held it with
both his for a moment, while Martin waved from the sofa,
quite happy to stay where he was without having to move.
I forget." Dan turned back, already on his way
to the door, fag packet in hand, "where did you
get those toys from?"
Gordon grinned, holding up his hand that showed faint
red rings where the restraints had dug in while he'd
struggled. "It's mail order, hang on, I get the
catalogue for you." Retrieving it from a stack
of magazines near the telly, he came back and handed
Dan a colourful printed mag, quite thick as well. "We
got the latest issue, but this one will do, they still
have everything in stock."
again." Dan grinned like a shark once more, rolling
the catalogue up to stash it in the inside pocket of
gave a silent laugh. Mail order torture. The thought
was bizarre. Dan had had a taste of blood, and he assumed
Dan would read this cover to cover.
we're off, or we'll be falling asleep on our feet. Not
that young anymore." Dan laughed as he waited for
Vadim to get through the door. "Until the following
weekend." He turned his head, "and
thanks." Smiling, he closed the door behind them.
didn't speak until they were outside in the dark, and
he wanted nothing but put an arm around Dan's waist
and get manoeuvred back to the hotel. Instead, he walked
close, arm every now and then touching Dan's. "Strange.
Didn't speak more than fifty words with them, all told,
but I liked them."
Dan nodded, leading them back to the centre, he stopped
in front of a brightly lit kebab place. "You never
know, we might get ourselves a strange set of weird
friends in our old age."
have a talent for making friends
" Dan truly
had. But that was alright. One of them had to be good
laughed and looked as if he were about to kiss Vadim,
before he pulled himself back and ventured into the
chippie to get a large portion of doner kebab, and some
for Vadim. Vadim wolfed the food down, which made him
even more tired, stumbling across a taxi just a little
night, once they were back in the hotel, they slept
dreamless and deep. Embracing each other and staying
close, as close as anyone could get.